ERE lies old Hobson; Death hath broke his girt, And here, alas! hath laid him in the dirt; He's here stuck in a slough, and overthrown. Dodged with him betwixt Cambridge and The Bull. Had not his weekly course of carriage fail'd; On the University carrier, who sickened in the time of his holiday; being forbid to go to London, by reason of the plague. It was he who established " Hobson's Choice." But lately finding him so long at home, And thinking now his journey's end was come, And that he had ta'en up his latest inn, In the kind office of a chamberlain Show'd him his room where he must lodge that night, Pull'd off his boots, and took away the light: If any ask for him, it shall be said, "Hobson has supp'd, and 's newly gone to bed." II. HERE lieth one, who did most truly prove So hung his destiny, never to rot While he might still jog on and keep his trot; Time numbers motion, yet (without a crime Too long vacation hasten'd on his term. Fainted, and died, nor would with ale be quicken'd; Nay," quoth he, on his swooning bed out-stretch'd, "If I mayn't carry, sure I'll ne'er be fetch'd, But vow, though the cross doctors all stood hearers, For one carrier put down to make six bearers." Ease was his chief disease; and, to judge right, He died for heaviness that his cart went light. His leisure told him that his time was come, And lack of load made his life burdensome, That even to his last breath (there be that say't), As he were press'd to death, he cried, "More weight;" But, had his doings lasted as they were, Obedient to the moon he spent his date Yet (strange to think) his wain was his increase: Only remains this superscription. gone, EPIGRAM. FROM WESTMINSTER DROLLERY. 1671.] WATCH lost in a tavern! That's a Crime; The Watch kept Time; and if Time will away, I see no reason why the Watch should stay. You say the Key hung out, and you forgot to lock it, Time will not be kept pris'ner in a Pocket. Henceforth, if you will keep your Watch, this do, HE that can sit three sermons in a day, And of those three scarce bear three words away; She that can rob her husband, to repair A budget-priest, that noses a long prayer; She that with lamp-black purifies her shoes, And with half-eyes and Bible softly goes; She that her pockets with lay-gospel stuffs, She that loves sermons as she does the rest, And judge men's hearts according to their hair; |