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fine pictures in the gallery, however;- nothing more charming, to my Town Talk.
mind, than Gainsborough's portrait of his wife; as fresh as if it had
been painted yesterday. When affection inspires genius, the results BY THE SAUNTERER IN BOOIETY.
are imperishable! The gallery is utterly unsuited for pictures-especially old and faded ones. It was just like the Boilers people to turn
the Refreshment Rooms of the '62 barn into picture galleries. The LAST and furious windows look out on the Horticultural Gardens, which are quite like
becomes the an unfinished burial-ground, catacombs included. They look' terribly
THE PROGRESS OF REFORM.
WHEN the Bill began to pass hasten the bill
Gladstone sneer'd at Tory tricks, - to break down
Adverse journals sigh’d, “ Alas !
Now the Whigs are in a fix."
Tories praised it long and loud,
Liberals were stern and sore; upon.“ Who is
Beales harangued a gaping crowd, this agent ?"
GLADSTONE only sneer'd the more. No! not Mr. BRIGHT. It is the Grouse, that knowing bird ! M.P.'s are determined to be in time to meet him, if they don't care about
Members throng'd the guilty cave, meeting their constituents. So, ere long, we may expect to see those
To the Tea-room Members came, noble chiefs, “ the handsome Youngman-Dizzy" (as LONGFELLOW has
And the Government to save it) and the Ur-lo-Dar-bee (as FENNIMORE COOPER would write it)
There they player a tricksy game. dancing their dance of triumph. For they have gone on the war-path,
To Hyde Park Reformers went, and lifted the scalps of their enemies, and there is consternation in the
In the train of BEALES, M.A., Whig-wams of their opponents !
WALPOLE giving sad consent
To the rowdy holiday.
HODGKINSOx rose in his place, displays of physical force was first brought to life by his misman.
With a dire amendment fired; agement of the Hyde Park affair? It really seems as if since that
Dizzy with a smiling face, time the rough element has lost no opportunity of a row. In the St.
Yielded all the House desired. James's Hall contest it is difficult to say which side behaved worse ; but in the Birmingham matter, I must say I think very small potatoes
Mill with gallantry sincere, of the Murphyites-and the fact that Mr. WHALLEY, who has so long
Would have giv'n the ladies votes, refused to sing at the invitation of the House of Commons, should
Could we to a shell-like ear become the Tyrtæus of fanatical violence does not incline me more
Whisper such discordant notes, favourably towards them. What a pity it is that with all our missions
As election tricks would need, and societies we have no society for the diffusion of gentle-manliness.
With the rough election fun ? If that creed had more followers the world would have less bigotry.
Though with logic Mill could plead, born rancours, and differences of religious opinion would not beget
No majority was won. latred, or create coolnesses among friends. If any one would but tart a mission for “the propagation of gentle-manliness," I'd wil.
Now new sleight of hand they try, ingly go round with the hat for it, and head the subscription list
While they redistribute seats ; rith a quotation:
Boroughs rise and Boroughs die,
While they keep official sweets.
Lowe looks on through all the years,
Still democracy's sworn foe.
Draw a veil o'er Gladstone's tears,
And the howls of BEALES AND Co.
A Brewin' that Bears Noble Fruit. BS. VALENTINE, gives a very clear but modest explanation of its aim, MRS. BREWIN, of Tiverton, has given £500 to the endowment fund id the book certainly is what it professes to be one that is a guide of the local infirmary. We trust those who may hereafter be ailing amusements, as well as employments, for home. It is comprehensive there will not forget their Brewin'-a BREwIy that deserves a place ough in scope, beginning with directions for making flower-chains among the local stars as a Nurser Major. d flower-dolls, and finishing with engraving, wood-carving, and delling. Home games, pastimes, and pursuits have all a share; d gardening and faneywork are not forgotten. No more complete
Musical Execution. ok of the sort has ever appeared. It is, moreover, well got up, and
Some singers must be looking forward anxiously to the days when untifully illustrated by the DaLzIeL BROTHERS.
capital punishment will be abolished. At present they run daily risk The Second Exhibition of National Portraits at South Kensington of being hanged, for they seldom appear in public without murdering a no better than the first, save that the catalogue is not such a dis- | song. lerly bungle as the last one. But the snobbish rule about " catauing portraits as described by owners" is still adhered to, so that
An Evergreen. collection is valueless, for the student has no means of ascertaining We suppose that, a hundred years hence, our descendants will be ich portraits are authentic and which forgeries. There are some charmed with the acting of CHARLES MATHEWS-ELAH, Esq.
No. 17. STRANGE product of our boastful time, This terrible and secret crime; And sadden'd every true man feels, As every day fresh sin reveals. When such societies hold rule, To teach men in a sinful school, To do dark deeds, the Law's strong hand Should sweep such plague-spots from the land.
Sweet maidens look love, with a shy light
6. Sae tapsalteerie gae the whafilin weans In there. You'll wonder what the first line means.
You draw to the table with satisfied heart,
But lost his lovely daughter ;
1. 3. We know him, one of the Abbassides, Great swells and caliphs, who once lived at ease.
ANSWER TO ACROSTIC No. 16.
She was fair of course, and stunning,
And a great prince dared to leave her
On a very gay deceiver.
“Oh, I Sees!"—When the Isis changes its identity, is it by a process of me-Thames-ychosis ?
HERE'S A GOOI
In accents loud and clear;
And wildly rings the cheer!
When he would orders send; “Go!" cries the victim, in a rage,
To his perfidious friend ! “ Ago!—too long ago, alas !!!
So mournful memory cries;
The brandy-drinker sighs.
In playing, scores your foe-
But murmur-“There's a go ?''
Which aggregates to millions in the sum
Of individual being: yet we come
In deepest life; or being's lightest scum,
Ever existed underneath the sun-
For be has ever since was earth begun
To take the greatest care of NUMBER ONE.
TAKING HIM, LITERALLY.
Polite Traveller :-“Well, I DON'T USUALLY DO IT 89 EARLY-BUT I WON'T REFUSE A
[Scrooby, whose weeds stand him in eighteen-pence a-piece is charmed.
A-MBWS-ING.–What adventure made Dick WHITTINGTON's fortune ?-A purr-adventure.
The Testimonial Mania.
Answers to Correspondents. We havo just dropt upon this in an old number of an Arbroath paper :
[We cannot return rejected MSS. or sketches unless they are accompanied “ PRESENTATION.--On Monday evening, the workers in the preparing department
by a stamped and directed envelope.] of Wellgate Mill-MR. Douglas FRASER'S-presented their foreman, MR. RICHARD F. B. S.-Your joke upon “Poor lean" and " Pauline” is simply dreadPROCTER, with two silk handkerchiefs, as a token of their respect and esteem. MR. 1 ful-it is Best-ial ! PROCTER suitably acknowledged the unexpected compliment.”,
"Fitz-IVAN WALKS IN"-to the waste-paper basket.
W. J. M.-“The Costermonger to his Donkey,” is Greek to us—or at all
events He-bray.ic. Really the testimonial folly has been rampant long enough, and it is “HIGHBURY New PARK.”-Riddles should be new—those that have time the dodge were blown on, as it is by this grave registering of the sifted the dust of ages are of no use to us. two bandannas.
R. C., Rochdale.—Your “indisposed conundrum'' is but an ill riddle.
A. P. E.- Please explain! “ Grattez le Russe."
R. L. P., Houghton.-You really Houghton-to do so. THERE is a saying attributed to the First NAPOLEON which declares
"THE SECRET BY THE SEA" cannot be breathed by us. We are ocean. that if you "scratch a Russian you will find a Tartar.” The Pole who
tide to secre-sea. attempted the life of the Czar may congratulate himself on having
1 ANON.-Shall be inserted-anon. Not before, that would be too much of
anon-er. missed his aim so completely. Had the Czar received a scratch his G. A. P.-How could a G. A. P. expect to fill a corner in FUN? would-be assassin might have caught a Tartar, instead of one who was E. K., Cambridge.—Might be inserted were E K-pable of writing comic generous enough to intercede for him with the French Emperor.
J. H., Hampstead.–Very comic—but appeared in Fun some time since.
0. S.—The“ Dholl" may be an Indian instrument, we only know it as Lines on a Low-crowned Hat.
a Derby ornament. Oh, dear, who can that hatter be
Ghost.-Clearly not the ghost of a joke.
SPES.-Being 'Ope you evidently won't be shut-up.
J. B., Prospect Lodge.- Has no prospect of lodging in our columns.
GARCON.- Which is French for îWeighter"'--little too heavy, but if Furnished that thing that you wear ?
you will send, the MS. waits you.
JOEY BAGSHOT.-Be comforted.
M. S. M., Great Portland-street.-A good idea, but too niggardly carried
out in the verse.
Declined with thanks,-R. B. N., Liverpool; J. E. L., Eton; G. M.,
Punster; J. R., Commercial-road; X. Y. X., Dublin; The candid speech of MR. DISRAELI, delivered lately at the dinner
S. F. C.; A Reader; H.; Tom Tite, Peckham;"R. B., Sloane-street; of the Merchant Taylors' Company, has caused some wonder. We
M. D., Clerkenwell; Á. S.' E.; “At your service;" C. J. C., Longdale; understand that he was induced to enter thus minutely into the posi
H. R. s., Liverpool; Pede; J. S.; H. R., Kilburn Priory; H. E. A.; tion of Government by a desire to propitiate those important personages
| W. P.; F. H. E.; . Y., Dublin ; O. E. R., Clapham Common; G. B. K.; -the Tailors of Tooley-street.
“ Tom-that's me;" R. Š., Northampton; D. O. N., Upper Baker-street; F. G, S.
THE PARIS EXHIBITION.
COLE, Considerable Bumptious may think. As to grub, why there's
a place here by the name of Tissot-Coffee dell o' Regency they call WROTE ON A BENCH IN THE JARDINS OF THE PALLIASS ROYAL, it, where there's allegmode beef as is as good as ever I eat at Paris.
WILLIAMS' in the Old 'Bailey; and as for mussels—a many I've had DEAR 'LIZA,-Me and Bob is parted company since I've been going
out of a sarcer in Smithfield when I was a boy, but not to equal these, about in a turban and top-boots, which for baseness I don't know
8 as I breakfast on règ'lar. The Pallis Royle's the place for my money. Robert's equal, for to chaff me and say I looked like a Turkey rubub | as there's lots o company, a military band, and no end of obildren with merchant as used to be in the Minories, when it was all his fault.
fault their nussmaids, as they call buns, goodness knows why, except because Says I, pretty quick, “ Well, I ain't a-goin' to be a Turkey sponge, so
some of em's so precious crummy. I must have my joke, you know. you go your ways and I'll go mine." It was all through him and his
Sam TROTTLB. goins' on with that young party as died her hair in the bitter beer bar, which, as I told you, he called her NeKILLINA, and was that sweet upon that one day, when he sees a old indiwiddle a-makin' up to her,
A Tick against Hamlet. ROBERT he behaved improper, a-speaking of the elderly person as a | A FRIEND of ours, who is very much indebted to everybody, informs “potterin' old tout," as the gal sets off gigglin', and the party hisself | us that SHAKESPEARE is amongst his creditors. He says he owes him uses language wot the Italians calls sort of vokey. I'm blest if I one for making HAMLET remark, “Buy—and buy is easily said” didn't think I'd seen the old bloke before, and I remimber now as I'd without stating where the money was to come from. seen him about the ruins down in Farrin'don-street, where the sportin' publicans and that lot used to be a-waitin' for NEWCOMB—or else at
After Faed. the place where the bloomin' pork butcher giv the tips, by the name of Nicholas; he'd giv an' take the hods for shillin's an' sixpences,
BITTERSWEET, whose judgment as a critic is unimpeachable, says, but seems to have made a hat-full, or else what brings him here that when be sees Shoddy's turn-out in the park - (Shoddy has Well it must ha' been NICHOLAS as revenged hisself by giving the office lately made a good thing out of army contracts)-it reminds him of to the sourjohndevils to make me a marked man, for calling out “The First Break in the Family." “ Waterloo " in the face of BONYPARTY's statute. Anyways, I've been obliged to make my lucky for a time, and that disguised for all Bob
Drop it, I say! says it's all rubbish, in a left-off turban as I give a quartern o' rum for to a Zoohalf, and the top boots as I borrowed of a chap as used to be
We understand that an eminent medical practitioner has discovered at the horse repository in Barbican, and is now in the Rooshun stables
an unfailing specific for the gout. In compliment to the EARL OF a drinkin' of bis beer with his betters. These disguises, with a loose
|| DERBY, he calls his discovery “Rupert's Drops." sort of a bedgown, which the French calls a pig-gnaw, and a false beard, as hange to my ears with a couple of wire hooks, is what I'm
On the Spot. come to, and only go out of evenin's for the hair. But law! I'm blest
MR. ROBERTS, the champion billiard player, is so proficient in the if I ain't better off than I've been since here I come ; for I can git a spot-stroke, that he can enter the den of leopards in the Zoological bit o' vittles now in quiet without havin' to go to that blessed |
Gardens and caress the animals with perfect impunity. Exhibition every day, as was reg'lar slavery. This Palis Royle bangs it holler I can tell you, as is somethink like the Lowther Arcade put inside of the new park at Kennington, and as for shops, by GEORGE, Why do the Upper Ten crowd 60 to the Prince of Wales's 2there's more to see here than there is at the other place, for all as MR. Because they're afraid of losing Caste.
SECOND SIGHT. Agricultural Gentleman (who has just dined) to old Slableman, who has brought round the wrong horse :—“THAT ISN'T MINE !" Ou Stableman, decisively :-“OH, YES, IT 18 !” Agricultural Gentleman :-“WHY, CONFOUND YOU, DO YOU THINK I DON'T KNOW MY OWN HORSE ?". Old Stableman : -"No, SIR; BUT I THOUGHT P'R'APS YOU saw tuo HORSES, AND WBRE LOOKING AT THE OTHER !"
Conduce to the national honour,
How England the better can be
By wholesale corruption-like me.
THE SONG OF THE HONEST M.P.
As ladies change bonnet or dress;
And feign the sincerest distress,
Conservatives chum with the cad,
By sending Reform to the bad.
Is going in hot for Reforms;
Against a residuum storms.
Will last to the end of July;
With heat, to the moors we shall fly.
They mock us by calling “Select.”
The Member electors reject,
Who envies his senator friends,
And nothing to make them amends.
And prate of the patriot's work,
The Dean's English. We have been rather amused to read, in a northern paper, an account of the distribution of prizes at the High School of Carlisle. The report winds up thus :
“The proceedings were brought to a close by the usual votes of thanks followed by the singing of the National Anthem, and the customary rounds of cheers. The jury returned a verdict of Accidental Death.' ” We could not understand the incoherency of this until we noticed the phrase “brought to a CLO8B.” Of course the well-known Dean inspires the absurdity.
Portugal-lantry. We see it announced that the King Of PORTUGAL has started on a tour “having at last obtained the consent of the Cortes to leave the country.” Happy King! There are many monarchs who would have no difficulty in obtaining the consent of their people to their leaving the country for any length of time. Still we must say that we do not envy His Majesty who can only get leave for a holiday as an act of Cortes-y.
The Long and short of it. SUPPOSING ANAK to be as he is stated the tallest man living, why is he like a daily contemporary?
Because he must have the largest circulation in the world."