And JIMMY went down with his JANE that day,

And JOHN by the collar or nape

Seized everybody who came in his way

(And I had a narrow escape).

He noticed his EMILY JANE with JIM,

And envied the well-made elf;

And people remarked that he muttered "Oh, dim!”

(I often say "dim!" myself).

JOHN dogged them all day, without asking their leaves;

For his sergeant he told, aside,

That JIMMY and JANE were notorious thieves

(And I think he was justified).

But JAMES wouldn't dream of abstracting a fork,
And JENNY Would blush with shame

At stealing so much as a bottle or cork
(A bottle I think fair game).

But, ah! there's another more serious crime!

They wickedly strayed upon

The course, at a critical moment of time (I pointed them out to JOHN).

The constable fell on the pair in a crack-
And then, with a demon smile,

Let JENNY cross over, but sent JIMMY back
(I played on my harp the while).

Stern JOHNNY their agony loud derides

With a very triumphant sneer—

They weep and they wail from the opposite sides (And I shed a silent tear).

And JENNY is crying away like mad,
And JIMMY is swearing hard;

And JOHNNY is looking uncommonly glad
(And I am a doggerel bard).

But JIMMY he ventured on crossing again

The scenes of our Isthmian Games

JOHN caught him, and collared him, giving him pain. (I felt very much for JAMES).

JOHN led him away with a victor's hand,

And JIMMY was shortly seen

In the station-house under the grand Grand Stand

(As many a time I've been).

And JIMMY, bad boy, was imprisoned for life,

Though EMILY pleaded hard;

And JOHNNY had EMILY JANE to wife

(And I am a doggerel bard).

Bal

THE PERILS OF INVISIBILITY.

LD PETER led a wretched life

OLD

Old PETER had a furious wife

Old PETER too was truly stout,

He measured several yards about.

The little fairy PICKLEKIN

One summer afternoon looked in,
And said, "Old PETER, how de do?
Can I do anything for you?

"I have three gifts the first will give
Unbounded riches while you live;
The second health where'er you be;
The third, invisibility."

"O little fairy PICKLEKIN,"

Old PETER answered with a grin, "To hesitate would be absurd,Undoubtedly I choose the third.”

""Tis yours," the fairy said; "be quite Invisible to mortal sight

Whene'er you please.

Remember me

Most kindly, pray, to MRS. P."

Old MRS. PETER Overheard

Wee PICKLEKIN'S concluding word,

And, jealous of her girlhood's choice,

Said, "That was some young woman's voice!"

Old PETER let her scold and swear-
Old PETER, bless him, didn't care.
"My dear, your rage is wasted quite-
Observe, I disappear from sight!"

A well-bred fairy (so I've heard)
Is always faithful to her word:
Old PETER vanished like a shot,
But then-his suit of clothes did not!

For when conferred the fairy slim
Invisibility on him,

She popped away on fairy wings,
Without referring to his "things."

So there remained a coat of blue,
A vest and double eyeglass too,
His tail, his shoes, his socks as well,
His pair of no, I must not tell.