But there! I must go. Sister's coming. But I

wish I could wait, just to see

If she runs up to you and she kissed you in the way that she used to kiss Lee."

BRET HARTE.

LINES.

Man wants but little here below,"
He is not hard to please;

But every woman that we know

Wants everything she sees.

UNKNOWN.

WHEN I WAS A GIRL.

(Pathetic.)

When I was a girl, and I mind it well,
I tended baby, and how it did yell!
It yelled so much that I vowed when I
Was of age I would hear no baby cry.

WHEN I WAS A GIRL.

21

When I was of age, and I mind it well,
With a sweet young man in love I fell;
And I fell so far that I said, "I'll see,"
When he asked, "My love, won't you marry me?"

When we were married, and I mind it well, There came a little baby, and how it did yell! It yelled so much that again I swore

While my husband laughed-I would hear no

more.

The years passed on, and I mind them well,
For each new year came the same old yell;
But I loved my jewels, so welcome to our nest,
And I said, "When I'm old then I shall have
rest."

And now I am old, but alas, you see,

There is no rest from that yell for me;

For sons and daughters think I alone can quell Their crying babies when they yell! yell!! yell!!! ANONYMOUS.

THE DEACON'S CAT.

A certain Presbyterian cat
Went out to seek her prey,

And round the house she caught a mouse,
Upon the Sabbath day.

The Deacon, much offended

At such an act profane,

Laid down the book, the cat he took,

And bound her with a chain.

"You vile and wicked creature!
You bloodsucker!" quoth he;
"Which do you think to bring to hell,
My holy wife or me?

"For now be well assured,

That blood for blood shall pay,

For taking of the mouse's life,
Upon the Sabbath day!"

The Deacon laid his Bible down,

And earnestly he prayed

That the great sin the cat had done
Might not on them be laid.

23

35

IN BEAUTY'S SATCHEL.

Then unto execution,

Poor pussy she was drawn;

And on a tree they hang'd she,
And the Deacon sang the psalm.

ANONYMOUS.

(Old poem.)

IN BEAUTY'S SATCHEL.

Two oranges, a spool of thread,
Three handkerchiefs, a box of candy;
Two letters, saved to be reread,
A button-hook, to have it handy;
A novel she ought not to see,

Some hooks and eyes, her tiny purse;
Her Cæsar, that to-morrow she

With stumbling efforts will rehearse;
Two nickels glued by tutti-frutti,
A rosebud which a paper wraps;
A tract to teach her moral duty,
Another, which her fortune maps;
With this array, and more beside,

Was her small handbag overladen,

And, still, for more, and more she sighed,

This blushing, charming, high-school maiden.

UNKNOWN.

IT WAS THERE.

They stopped on the steps ere they went to the play,

And she suddenly started and cried, "Oh, say!

"The key of the house, my dear, is above; Go run and fetch it, now there is a love.

"Go look in the closet, just off from the stair, It lies in my grenadine pocket up there.”

And so with step that was joyous and light
He bounded upstairs in the gathering night.

And the door of the closet he opened quite wide, And he smiled to himself as he stepped inside.

And he clutched with a chuckle the old grenadine,

And he felt for the place where a pocket he'd

seen.

Then he thought that the garment was inside out, So with teeth set together he turned it about,

And felt with a feverish hand in vain

For a slit, and he swore with his might and main;