His love was great, though his wit was small; They rode by elm, and they rode by oak, You shall always ramble through life with me." But kicked the gray mare, and away she spurred. And enjoyed like a wooer the dust she made. - They rode through moss, and they rode through moor, At last they came to a miry place, And there the sad wooer gave up the chase. Quoth he, "If my nag were better to ride, O, it is not my love that begins to fail, gray mare's tail!" AN OPEN QUESTION. "It is the king's highway that we are in, and in this way it is that thou nast placed the lions."- BUNYAN. WHAT! shut the Gardens! lock the latticed gate! And hang a wooden notice up to state, "On Sundays no admittance at this wicket!" Of putting too much Sabbath into Sunday- The Gardens, so unlike the ones we dub Of Tea, wherein the artisan carouses,- Wherefore should they be closed like public-houses? No ale is vended at the wild Deer's Head, The Lion is not carved or gilt or red, So different from other Sunday beavers ! What is the brute profanity that shocks The super-sensitively serious feeling? The Kangaroo is he not orthodox To bend his legs, the way he does, in kneeling! Was strict Sir Andrew, in his Sabbath coat, Struck all a-heap to see a Coati mundi? Or did the Kentish Plumtree faint to note The Pelicans presenting bills on Sunday? But what is your opinion, Mrs. Grundy? What feature has repulsed the serious set? What error in the bestial birth or breeding, To put their tender fancies on the fret? One thing is plain-it is not in the feeding! Some stiffish people think that smoking joints For they all eat cold dinners on a Sunday - The Snake, pro tempore, the true Satanic? Do Irish minds,- (whose theory allows That now and then Good Friday falls on Monday) Do Irish minds suppose that Indian Cows Are wicked Bulls of Bashan on a Sunday? There are some moody Fellows, not a few, And think when they are dismal they are pious: Has sent the brutes to Coventry till Monday- What dire offence have serious Fellows found To raise their spleen against the Regent's spinney? Were charitable boxes handed round, And would not Guinea Pigs subscribe their guinea? Perchance, the Demoiselle refused to moult The feathers in her head at least till Monday; Or did the Elephant, unseemly, bolt A tract presented to be read on Sunday? At whom did Leo struggle to get loose? Who mourns through Monkey tricks his damaged clothing? Who has been hissed by the Canadian Goose? On whom did Llama spit in utter loathing? Some Smithfield Saint did jealous feelings tell To keep the Puma out of sight till Monday, Because he preyed extempore as well As certain wild Itinerants on SundayBut what is your opinion, Mrs. Grundy? To me it seems that in the oddest way (Begging the pardon of each rigid Socius) Our would-be Keepers of the Sabbath-day Are like the Keepers of the brutes ferociousAs soon the Tiger might expect to stalk About the grounds from Saturday till Monday, If Saints could clap him in a cage on Sunday---- In spite of all hypocrisy can spin, As surely as I am a Christian scion, I cannot think it is a mortal sin (Unless he's loose)-to look upon a lion. I really think that one may go, perchance, To see a bear, as guiltless as on Monday- In spite of all the fanatic compiles, I cannot think the day a bit diviner, That what we christen "Natural" on Monday, The wondrous history of Bird and Beast, The Dove, the winged Columbus of man's haven? The tender Love-Bird or the filial Stork? The punctual Crane- the providential Raven? The Pelican whose bosom feeds her young? Nay, must we cut from Saturday till Monday That feathered marvel with a human tongue, Because she does not preach upon a Sunday --But what is your opinion, Mrs. Grundy? The busy Beaver- that sagacious beast! The horned Rhinoceros - the spotted LeopardThe Creatures of the Great Creator's hand Are surely sights for better days than Monday The Elephant, although he wears no band, Has he no sermon in his trunk for Sunday? What harm if men who burn the midnight-oil, Weary of frame, and worn and wan of feature, Seek once a week their spirits to assoil, And snatch a glimpse of " Animated Nature" Better it were if, in his best of suits, The artisan, who goes to work on Monday, Should spend a leisure-hour amongst the brutes, Than make a beast of his own self on SundayBut what is your opinion, Mrs. Grundy? Why, zounds! what raised so Protestant a fuss (Omit the zounds! for which I make apology) |