Stew. I am none of these, my lord; I beseech your pardon. Lear. Do you bandy looks with me, you rascal? [Striking him.

Stew. I'll not be struck, my lord.
Kent. Nor tript neither, you

Lear. I thank thee, fellow.
I'll love thee.

base foot-ball player. [Tripping up his heels. Thou serv'st me, and

Kent. Come, Sir, arife, away; I'll teach you differences: away, away; if you will measure your lubber's length again, tarry again; but away, go to: have you wisdom? fo. [Pushes the Steward out.

Lear. Now, my friendly knave, I thank thee; there's earnest of thy service.

Fool.

SCENE XIIL.

To them, Enter Fool.

L ET me hire him too, here's my coxcomb. [Giving his cap. Lear. How now, my pretty knave? how dost thou? Fool. Sirrah, you were best * take my coxcomb. Kent. Why, my boy ?

Fool. Why? for taking one's part, that is out of favour; nay, as thou canst not smile as the wind fits, thou'lt catch cold shortly. There, take my coxcomb; why, this fellow has banish'd two of his daughters, and did the third a blessing against his will; if thou follow him, thou must needs wear my coxcomb. How now, uncle? would, I had two coxcombs, and two daughters.

Lear. Why, my boy?

Fool. If I give them all my living, I'll keep my

3

coxcomb myself; there's mine, beg another of thy daughters.

Lear. Take heed, Sirrah, the whip-

Fool. Truth's a dog must to kennel; he must be whipp'd out, when the lady brach may stand by th' fire and stink.

Lear. A peftilent gall to me.

Fool. Sirrah, I'll teach thee a speech. (To Kent.

Lear. Do.

Fool. Mark it, nuncle;

Have more than thou showeft,
Speak less than thou knowest,
Lend less than thou owest,
Ride more than thou goeft,
Learn more than thou trowest,
Set less than thou throwest,
Leave thy drink and thy whore,
And keep within door,
And thou shalt have more
Than two tens to a score.

Kent. This is nothing, fool.

Fool. Then it is like the breath of an unfee'd lawyer, you gave me nothing for't; can you make no ufe of nothing, nuncle?

Lear. Why, no, boy; nothing can be made out of nothing.

Fool. Pr'ythee, tell him, so much the rent of his land comes to: he will not believe a fool. [To Kent. Lear. A bitter fool!

Fool. Doft thou know the difference, my boy, between a bitter fool and a sweet one?

Lear. No, lad, teach me.

Fool. That Lord, that counsel'd thee to give away

thy Land,

Come, place him here by me! do Thou for him stand;
The sweet and bitter Fool will presently appear,
The One in motely here; the Other found out there.

Lear. Doft thou call me fool, boy?

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VOL. VII.

C

Fool.

Fool. All thy other titles thou hast given away; that thou wast born with.

Kent. This is not altogether fool, my lord.

Fool. No, faith; Lords, and great men will not let me; if I had a monopoly on't, they would have part on't: nay, the Ladies too, they'll not let me have all fool to myself, they'll be snatching. Give me an egg, nuncle, and I'll give thee two crowns. Lear. What two crowns shall they be?

Fool. Why, after I have cut the egg i'th' middle and eat up the meat, the two crowns of the egg; when thou clovest thy Crown i'th' middle and gav'it away both parts, thou bor'st thine ass on thy back o'er the dirt; thou hadst little wit in thy bald crown, when thou gav'st thy golden one away: if I fpeak like myself in this, let him be whipp'd that first finds it footh.

Fools ne'er had less grace in a year,
For wife men are grown foppish;
And know not how their wits to wear,
Their manners are so apish.

[Singing.

Lear. When were you wont to be fo full of fongs, firrah?

Fool. I have used it, nuncle, e'er since thou mad'st. thy daughters thy mothers; for when thou gav'ft them the rod, and put'st down thy own breeches,

Then they for fudden joy did weep,
And I for forrow fung;
That fuch a King should play bo-peeр,
And go the fools among.

[Singing.

Pr'ythee, nuncle, keep a school-mafter that can teach thy fool to lie; I would fain learn to lie.

Lear. If you lie, firrah, we'll have you whipt.

Fool. I marvel, what kin thou and thy daughters

are: they'll have me whipt for speaking true, thou'lt have

-J; have me whipt for lying; and, fometimes, I am whipt for holding my peace. ce. I had rather be any kind o'thing than a fool, and yet I would not be thee, te nuncle; thou hast pared thy wit o'both fides, and par left nothing i'th' middle: here comes one o'th' parealings.

D

SCENE XIV.

To them, Enter Gonerill.

Lear. How now, daughter, what makes that

dith' frown.

k

frontlet you much of late

Fool. Thou wast a pretty fellow, when thou hadst no need to care for her frowning; now thou art an ds O without a figure; I am better than thou art now; I am a fool, thou art nothing. Yes, forsooth, I will hold my tongue; [To Gonerill.] so your face bids me, though you say nothing.

Mum, mum, he that keeps nor cruft nor crum, [Singing. Weary of all, shall want fome.

- Thou art a sheal'd peafcod.

[Speaking to Lear.

Gon. Not only, Sir, this your all-licens'd fool,

But other of your infolent retinue,
Do hourly carp and quarrel, breaking forth
In rank and not to be endured riots.

I thought, by making this well known unto you,
T' have found a safe redress; but now grow fearful,
By what yourself too late have spoke and done,
That you protect this course, and put it on
By your. allowance; if you should, the fault
Would not 'scape cenfure, nor the redresses sleep;
Which, in the tender of a wholesome weal,
Might in their working do you that offence,
(Which else were shame,) that then neceffity

Will call difcreet proceeding.

Fool. For you know, nuncle,

The hedge-sparrow fed the Cuckoo so long,
That it had its head bit off by its Young;

So out went the candle, and we were left darkling.
Lear. Are you our daughter?

Gon. I would, you would make use of your good

wifdom,

Whereof I know you are fraught, and put away
These difpofitions, which of late transport you
From what you rightly are..

Fool. May not an Ass know when the cart draws the horse? whoop, Jug, I love thee.

Lear. Does any here know me? this is not Lear : Does Lear walk thus ? speak thus? where are his eyes? Either his notion weakens, his difcernings Are lethargied-Ha! waking- 'tis not fo; Who is it that can tell me who I am? Lear's shadow? I would learn; for by the marks Of fovereignty of knowledge, and of reason, I should be false perfuaded I had daughters. Your name, fair gentlewoman?

Gon. This admiration, Sir, is much o'th' savour
Of other your new pranks. I do beseech you,
To understand my purposes aright.
You, as you're old and reverend, should be wife.
Here do you keep a hundred Knights and Squires,
Men fo diforder'd, so debauch'd and bold,
That this our Court, infected with their manners,
Shews like a riotous Inn; Epicurism and luft
Make it more like a tavern or a brothel,
Than a grac'd Palace. Shame itself doth speak
For inftant remedy. Be then defir'd
By her, that else will take the thing she begs,
Of fifty to disquantity your train;
And the remainders, that shall still depend,
To be fuch men as may befort your age,

And know themselves and you.
Lear. Darkness and devils!

Saddle