CHAP. VII.

How these singular barbarians turned out to be notorious squatters. How they built air castles, and attempted to initiate the Nederlanders in the mystery of bundling.

In the last chapter I have given a faithful and unprejudiced account of the origin of that fingular race of people, inhabiting the country eastward of the Nieuw-Nederlandts; but I have yet to mention certain peculiar habits which rendered them exceedingly obnoxious to our ever honoured Dutch ancestors.

The most prominent of thefe was a certain rambling propenfity, with which, like the fons of Ishmael, they seem to have been gifted by heaven, and which continually goads them on, to fhift their refidence from place to place, fo that a Yankee farmer is in a constant state of migration; tarrying occafionally here and there; clearing lands for other people to enjoy, building houses for others to inhabit, and in a manner may be confidered the wandering Arab of America.

His first thought, on coming to the years of manhood, is to settle himself in the world-which means nothing more nor lefs than to begin his rambles. To this end he takes unto himself for a wife fome dashing country heiress; that is to fay, a buxom rofy cheeked wench, passing rich in red ribbands, glass beads, and

mock tortoife-fhell combs, with a white gown and morocco fhoes for Sunday, and deeply skilled in the mystery of making apple sweetmeats, long fauce, and pumpkin pie.

Having thus provided himself, like a true pedlar with a heavy knapsack, wherewith to regale his fhoulders through the journey of life, he literally fets out on the peregrination. His whole family, household furniture, and farming utenfils are hoifted into a covered cart; his own and his wife's wardrobe packed up in a firkin-which done, he shoulders his axe, takes staff in hand, whifties "yankee doodle" and trudges off to the woods, as confident of the protection of providence, and relying as cheerfully upon his own resources, as did ever a patriarch of yore, when he journeyed into a strange country of the Gentiles. Having buried himself in the wilderness, he builds himself a log hut, clears away a cornfield and potatoe patch, and providence fmiling upon his labours, is foon furrounded by a fnug farm and fome half a fcore of flaxen headed urchins, who, by their fize feem to have fprung all at once out of the earth, like a crop of toad-ftools.

But it is not the nature of this most indefatigable of speculators to reft contented with any state of fublunary enjoyment-improvement is his darling paffion, and having thus improved his lands, the next care is to provide a manfion worthy the refidence of a land holder. A huge palace of pine boards immediately

fprings up in the midst of the wilderness, large enough for a parish church, and furnished with windows of all dimenfions, but fo rickety and flimfy withal, that every blaft gives it a fit of the ague.

By the time the outside of this mighty air castle is completed, either the funds or the zeal of our adventurer are exhausted, so that he barely manages to half finish one room within, where the whole family burrow together-while the reft of the house is devoted to the curing of pumpkins, or ftoring of carrots and potatoes, and is decorated with fanciful feftoons of wilted peaches and dried apples. The outfide remaining unpainted, grows venerably black with time; the family wardrobe is laid under contribution for old hats, petticoats, and breeches, to ftuff into the broken windows, while the four winds of heaven keep up a whistling and howling about this aerial palace, and play as many unruly gambols, as they did of yore, in the cave of old Eolus.

The humble log hut, which whilome neftled this improving family fnugly within its narrow but comfortable walls, ftands hard by in ignominious contrast, degraded into a cow house or pig ftye; and the whole cene reminds one forcibly of a fable, which I am furprised has never been recorded, of an afpiring Inail, who quit his humble habitation, which he filled with great refpectability, to crawl into the empty fhell of a lobfter-where he would no doubt have refided with great ftyle and fplendour, the envy and

hate of all the pains-taking fnails of his neighbourhood, had he not accidentally perished with cold, in one corner of his stupendous mansion.

Being thus completely fettled, and to ufe his own words, "to rights," one would imagine that he would begin to enjoy the comforts of his fituation, to read newspapers, talk politics, neglect his own bufinefs, and attend to the affairs of the nation, like a`ufeful and patriotic citizen; but now it is that his wayward difpofition begins again to operate. He foon grows tired of a spot, where there is no longer any room for improvement-sells his farm, air castle, petticoat windows and all, reloads his cart, fhoulders his axe, puts himfelf at the head of his family, and wanders away in fearch of new lands-again to fell trees-again to clear cornfields-again to build a shingle palace, and again to fell off, and wander.

Such were the people of Connecticut, who bordered upon the eastern frontier of Nieuw-Nederlandts, and my readers may eafily imagine what obnoxious neighbours this light hearted but reftlefs tribe must have been to our tranquil progenitors. If they cannot, I would ask them, if they have ever known one of our regular, well organized, Dutch families, whom it hath pleased heaven to afflict with the neighbourhood of a French boarding house. The honeft old burgher cannot take his afternoon's pipe, on the bench before his door, but he is perfecuted with the fcraping of fiddles, the chattering of women, and the fqual

ling of children-he cannot fleep at night for the horrible melodies of fome amateur, who chooses to serenade the moon, and difplay his terrible proficiency in execution, by playing demifemiquavers in alt on the clarionet, the hautboy, or fome other foft toned inftrument—nor can he leave the street door open, but his house is defiled by the unfavoury vifits of a troop of pug dogs, who even fometimes carry their loathfome ravages into the fanctum fanctorum, the parlour!

If my readers have ever witneffed the fufferings of fuch a family, fo fituated, they may form fome idea how our worthy ancestors were diftreffed by their mercurial neighbours of Connecticut.

Gangs of these marauders, we are told, penetrated into the New-Netherland fettlements and threw whole villages into confternation by their unparalleled volubility, and their intolerable inquifitiveness-two evil habits hitherto unknown in those parts, or only known to be abhorred; for our ancestors were noted, as being men of truly Spartan taciturnity, and who neither knew nor cared aught about any body's concerns but their own. Many enormities were committed on the high ways, where several unoffending burghers were brought to a stand, and tortured with questions and gueffes, which outrages occafioned as much vexation and heart burning as does the modern right of fearch on the high feas.

Great jealoufy did they likewife ftir up, by their intermeddling and fucceffes among the divine fex; for