tures, which speak of the obligations and duties of a minister, and which hitherto 1 had not observed, or very loosely attended to. In particular, it is yet fresh in my memory, that I was much affected with considering the charge of precious souls committed to me, and the awful account one day to be rendered of them; as this subject occurred to me in meditating on Ezekiel, c. 33—v. 7, 9. "So thou,

O son of man, I have set thee as a watchman unto the house of Israel; therefore thou shalt hear the word at my mouth, and warn them from me. When I say unto the wicked, O wicked man, thou shalt surely die; if thou dost not speak to warn the wicked from his way, that wicked man shall die in his iniquity, but his blood will I require at thine hand. Nevertheless, if thou warn the wicked of his way, to turn from it; if he do not turn from his way, he shall die in his iniquity, but thou hast delivered thy soul.". I was fully convinced with Bishop Burnet, that every minister is as much concerned in this solemn warning, as the prophet himself. Acts

c. XX. v. 17-35 was another portion of Scripture, which by means of this book, was brought home to my conscience; especially verses 26, 27, 28, which serve as an illustration of the foregoing Scriptures: "Wherefore I take you to record this day, that I am pure from the blood of all men, for I have not shunned to declare unto you all the counsel of God. Take heed, therefore, unto yourselves and to all the flock, over which the Holy Ghost hath made you overseers to feed the church of God, which he hath purchased with his own blood."

In short, at his instance I was put upon the attentive and repeated perusal of the Epistles to Timothy and Titus, as containing the sum of a minister's duty in all ages. I searched out and carefully considered every text I could find in the whole Scripture, which referred to this argument. I was greatly impressed by 1 Cor. c. ix. v. 16. "For necessity is laid upon me; yea, woe is me, if I preach not the gospel." Nor was I less struck with Colossians, c. iv. v. 17. "Say to Archippus, take heed to the ministry, which thou hast received of

This

the Lord, that thou fulfil it." was brought to my conscience with power, as if the Apostle had in person But espe

spoken these words to me. cially, I was both instructed and encouraged by meditating upon 1 Peter; c. v. V. 24. Feed the flock of God that is among you, taking the oversight thereof, not by constraint, but willingly; not for filthy lucre, but of a ready mind, neither as being lords over God's heritage, but as examples to the flock; and when the chief shepherd shall appear, ye shall receive a crown of glory, that fadeth not away.'

I hope the reader will excuse my prolixity in speaking on this subject; because in itself it is very important; and though I got no new views of gospel truth from this book, yet I received such a deep conviction of the difficulty, and importance of that work, in which I had thoughtlessly engaged, and of the imminent danger my soul was exposed to, if I neglected to devote myself wholly thereto, that therein was laid the foundation of all my subsequent conduct, and change of sentiment,

In,

deed, I was guilty of very criminal procrastination, after I had been thus convinced, and being engaged more, than I ought in other matters, I postponed, and neglected for a time, complying with the dictates of my conscience. But I never lost sight of the instruction I had received, nor ever had any comfortable reflection, until, having broken off all other engagements, I had given myself up to those studies and duties, which pertain unto the work of the ministry; and I have cause to bless God, that this book ever came in my way.

Still, however, my self-confidence was very little abated, and my advance in the knowledge of the truth very small. I next read Tillotson's sermons, and Jortin's works; and my time being otherwise engaged, I gave into the indolent custom of transcribing their discourses, with some alterations, to preach to my people. This precluded free meditation on the word of God, and led me for a time to take up my opinions upon trust, My preaching was in general that smooth, palatable mixture of law and gospel, which corrupts both; which,

flattering the pride, and prejudice, and soothing the conscience, pleases the careless sinner, and self-righteous formalist; but does real good to none.

About this time I foolishly engaged in a course of diversion and visiting, more than I had done, since my ordination this unfitted me for secret prayer, and close meditation, and rendered the Scriptures, and other relig ious studies insipid and irksome to me, (a never failing consequence of this vain compliance with the world.) For a time therefore my ardor was damped, my anxiety banished, and my inquiries. retarded. However, I was not permitted entirely to drop my religious pursuits. Generally I made it a rule to read something in the Scriptures every day, and had a task of daily devotion; but I was very formal and lifeless in both of them.

Yet, not long after, I was engaged in earnest meditation on our Lord's discourse with Nicodemus, (John, c. iii.) I felt an anxious desire to understand this interesting portion of Scripture; especially to know what it was to be born