And since his dress is all the fashion,
And since he's very dark and tall,
I think that out of pure compassion,
I'll get Papa to go and call,

"So Lord St. Ives is occupying
The whole of Mr. Ford's hotel !
Last Saturday his man was trying
A little nag I want to sell.

He brought a lady in the carriage;

Blue eyes,-eighteen, or thereabouts ;Of course, you know, we hope it's marriage, But yet the femme de chambre doubts. She looked so pensive when we met her,

Poor thing!-and such a charming shawl !-Well! till we understand it better,

It's quite impossible to call!

"Old Mr. Fund, the London Banker,
Arrived to-day at Premium Court;
I would not, for the world, cast anchor
In such a horrid dangerous port;
Such dust and rubbish, lath and plaster,-

(Contractors play the meanest tricks)The roof's as crazy as its master,

And he was born in fifty-six;

Stairs creaking-cracks in every landing,—

The colonnade is sure to fall;

We shan't find post or pillar standing,
Unless we make great haste to call.

"Who was that sweetest of sweet creatures Last Sunday in the Rector's seat?

The finest shape, the loveliest features,-
I never saw such tiny feet!

My brother, (this is quite between us)
Poor Arthur,-'twas a sad affair;
Love at first sight!-she's quite a Venus,
But then she's poorer far than fair;
And so my father and my mother
Agreed it would not do at all;
And so, I'm sorry for my brother!-
It's settled that we're not to call.

"And there's an author, full of knowledge;
And there's a captain on half-pay;
And there's a baronet from college,
Who keeps a boy and rides a bay;

And sweet Sir Marcus from the Shannon,
Fine specimen of brogue and bone;

And Doctor Calipee, the canon,

Who weighs, I fancy, twenty stone:

A maiden lady is adorning

The faded front of Lily Hall :— Upon my word, the first fine morning, We'll make a round, my dear, and call.”

Alas! disturb not, maid and matron,
The swallow in my humble thatch;
Your son may find a better patron,
Your niece may meet a richer match :
I can't afford to give a dinner,
I never was on Almack's list;
And, since I seldom rise a winner,
I never like to play at whist :
Unknown to me the stocks are falling,
Unwatched by me the glass may fall;
Let all the world pursue its calling, —
I'm not at home if people call.

(1829.)

THE FANCY BALL.

"A visor for a visor! What care I

What curious eye doth quote deformities?"

ROMEO AND Juliet.

"You used to talk," said Miss Mac Call,
"Of flowers, and flames, and Cupid;
But now you never talk at all;

You're getting vastly stupid:

You'd better burn your Blackstone, sir,
You never will get through it;
There's a Fancy Ball at Winchester,-
Do let us take you to it!"

I made that night a solemn vow
To startle all beholders;
I wore white muslin on my brow,

Green velvet on my shoulders;
My trousers were supremely wide,

I learnt to swear "by Allah!"
I stuck a poniard by my side,
And called myself “ Abdallah.”

VOL. II.

66

Oh, a fancy ball's a strange affair!

Made up of silks and leathers,

Light heads, light heels, false hearts, false hair, Pins, paint, and ostrich feathers:

The dullest duke in all the town,

To-day may shine a droll one;
And rakes, who have not half-a-crown,
Look royal in a whole one.

Go, call the lawyer from his pleas,
The school-boy from his Latin ;
Be stoics here in ecstacies,
And savages in satin;
Let young and old forego-forget
Their labour and their sorrow,
And none except the Cabinet—
Take counsel for the morrow.

Begone, dull care!

This life of ours

Is very dark and chilly;

We'll sleep through all its serious hours,

And laugh through all its silly. Be mine such motley scene as this,

Where, by established usance,

Miss Gravity is quite amiss,

And Madam Sense a nuisance !