O Lord, thou hast struck me to the ground, and what wouldest thou have me to do? I know: speak it evidently to my heart. If my own rebellious will does not oppose thy gracious design, I know I shall not want illumination and help.

I see plainly I am come to the turning point. From this day forward, a life of faith or sensuality;-of heavenly affections or prevailing love of earthly things;-of slavery or freedom;-of self-pleasing or entire devotedness to God.

One chain may bind us as fast to the world as a thousand. I have seemed to myself to be above it in many respects, but am sadly convinced it has all along had possession of me, and that my love of it, though less discernable, was perhaps more strong through centring in one object. Oh, that I might be buried in the same grave with her; and that, henceforth, I had nothing to do in the world but to live to him that died for me, and love God with a pure heart fervently!

It is necessary for me to obliterate as much as possible all such thoughts and remembrance of the deceased as may augment my sorrows, make resignation to God more difficult, and obstruct his salutary operations.

Affliction, in union with grace, works powerfully to the healing of the soul; and if the former does not send us to the latter,

E

we shall not experience the healing benefit of the great Physician. I can now think, if the dear deceased was alive again, what would I not do, forbear, or suffer for her sake: but if I am not willing to do as much for Christ, what can be the reason of it but want of love?

O, my heart! nature has had its turn in great weakness. When I went into the room where she was laid out, the sight of a breathless, extended, icy corps, so loved,— too much loved,-drew a flood of tears from me, with many sobs. I had not fortified myself before-hand by prayer and the exercise of resignation.

Blessed be God, I was more strengthened at her funeral, and hope I shall always remember it as an earnest of what he will do for me, upon all occasions, if I fly to his power.

If I look out for ease from the present distress any way but by resignation to the will of God, and desire of complete union with it for the remainder of my life, I take myself out of his hands, suffer without improvement, am still at the mercy of events, and shall be unprepared for my own death.

I have lost the dear partner of my heart to whom I used to unbosom myself without reserve, and communicate all my thoughts and cares, designs and wishes, joys and griefs, and in the want of her seem to my

self as if I were left alone in the midst of a desert.-Recall thyself, O my soul, wake from this stupor of a vain sorrow, and do not indulge a thought to harden thyself in it. Where is thy God! If thou hast him to go to what canst thou complain of? Make him thy friend and counsellor. He is now inviting and even forcing thee into his presence and familiarity. Speak as freely to him, as thou didst to her, and look so well to thyself that thou needst not be afraid to tell him all thy secrets.

No. V.

A PRAYER USED BY MR. ADAM IN A FIT

OF THE STONE.

O LORD, my Maker and Redeemer, I thank thee for all thy goodness to me, thy unworthy creature, and especially for the great mercy of the stone. I know thou sendest it for good, that I may make deep search into myself, and improve the pain of my body to the health and everlasting salvation of my soul. I confess my sins are more in number than the hairs of my head, and deserve a more severe chastisement; but thou dispenseth thy corrections with unerring wisdom, and I desire to submit myself, in all things, to thy gracious disposal, and to

choose what thou choosest for me. O let me say, by a mighty power from thy grace, It is good for me that I am afflicted, that my life may be a continual preparation for death, and death welcome, through a living faith in Christ Jesus, who hath taken out the sting of it, redeemed us unto thee by the blood of his cross, and insured our justification by his resurrection from the dead.

Bless, I beseech thee, the means used for my ease and recovery; for my help and trust is only in thee; and if thou dost not think it fit to grant my request, enable me to bear what thou layest upon me, without a murmuring thought, and with perfect resignation to thy blessed will.

O Lord God of my life and of all my mercies, deal with me as thou pleasest. Do thy own work in thy own way. Into thy hands I commend my spirit. Grant me thy peace, Carry me safely through all my trials; and make it the desire of my heart to know, love, and bless thee, and be prepared for the 'everlasting enjoyment of thec, through Jesus Christ.-Amen.

PREFACE.

THAT the reader may reap the full benefit of these thoughts, it seemed proper to obviate a plausible objection, which not only the careless and profane, but even many well-disposed persons may often feel themselves inclined to make. The objection may be conceived to run in this form: "If Mr. Adam was so good a man, how happens it that he should every. where be full of such complaints against his own sins and corruptions? It may be fairly allowed that he should be so in the commencement of his religious course; but is it not unaccountable that he should continue so through life? Is this the benefit of religion to keep a person in a perpetual state of misery and distress? The language he uses would suit the greatest slave to his lusts and vices; but not surely a man of exemplary piety and virtue like Mr. Adam. One would expect that such a man should have enjoyed a continual feast within, from the consciousness of his uprightness and sincerity."

The objection does not meet the case of our author only, but that of the most emi