THE YORKSHIREMAN AND HIS FAMILY.-ANON. SEATED one day inside the Leeds mail, a Yorkshireman came up and saluted the guard of the coach, with, " I say, Mr. Guard, have you a gentleman for Lunnun in coach ?" "How should I know ?" said the guard. "Well," said he, "I'm ganging about four miles whoam, and I'll gang inside, if you please, and then I can find him out mysen." On being admitted into the coach, when seated, he addressed himself to the gentleman opposite, and said, "Pray, sir, arn't you for Lunnun?" "Yes," said the gentleman. "Pray, sir, arn't you summut at singing line?" "What makes you ask?" said the gentleman. "I hope ne defence," said he, "only, sir, you mun know I'm building a mill, and in about three weeks I wants to have a sort of a house warming; and, as we are very musical in our parts, I plays the fiddle at church mysen, and my brother plays on a great long thing like a horse's leg, painted, with a bit of brass crook stuck in the end, and puffs away like a pig in a fit; and as we have a vast of music meetings in our parts, I should like to open my mill with a rory tory, and wanted to ax you to come and sing at it." He then related a family anecdote :— "You mun know, sir, that my father died all on a sudden like, and never give anybody notice he wur going to die, but he left his family in complete profusion; and when I found he wur dead, as I wur the oldest son, I thought I'd a right to all the money. I told neighbor so, but he said, that tho' I wur the eldest son, I had no right to all the brass; but I said, I wur not only the eldest, but that I wur the handsomest into the bargain, for you never seed five such ugly, carrotty-headed things among any litter of pigs, as my five brothers and sisters. So when I found they wanted to cheat me out of my intarnel estate, I determined to take the law at the top of the regicides !" "And you applied to counsel no doubt," said the gentleman. "Na, I didn't," said he, "for I don't know him, I went to one Lawyer Lattitat and paid him six and eight pence, all in good half pence, and he wrote me down my destructions." The gentle man read his destructions, as he called them, which were as follows: You must go to the Temple, apply to a civilian, and tell him that your father died intestate, or without a will, that he has left five children, all infantine, besides yourself; and that you wish to know if you can't be his'executor." "Well, what did you do?" said the gentleman. "Why, sir," said he, "I went to the Temple, and I knocked at the door, and the gentleman cum'd out himsen; and I said 'Pray, sir, arn't you a silly villain? and he ax'd me if I cum'd to insult him; and I said, why, yes, I partly cum'd on purpose: I cum'd to insult you to know what I am to do, for my father died detested and against his will, and left five young infidels besides mysen, and I am cum'd to know if I can't be his executioner." THE FARMER'S BLUNDER.-ANON. A FARMER once to London went, The steward's called, the accounts made even;- I 'ze use to make-and 'tis no wonder,- I'll with your zarvants pick a bit.” "Poh!" "it shan't be done;" And to the parlor pushed him on. A wag, to carry on the joke, 'Tis done; his congée made, the clown And off his trusty seat betrayed, As men, at twigs, in rivers sprawling, And there, minced pies, and geese, and pigeons; Some pudding sucked, and held his tongue; “Plague tak 't! I'ze tell you how'd 't would be; "I'll tear his eyes out!" squeaks Miss Dolly; ADDRESS TO A DUCHESS.-T. H. BAYLEY DEAR Dowager Duchess! though treble my age, For misses not out of their teens I have sighed, And prudence has whisper'd, "Mind what you're about; Your lip is no ruby, no diamond your eye, No rose is your cheek, and no lily your neck, That tell-tale, the pecrage, your age may betray; Some will say it is strange that a youth should be struck THE JUSTE MILIEU.-ANON. A BANKER there is in Baltimore, |