'TO GREGORY GRIFFIN, Esq.

DEAR SIR,

'You, who are scarcely entered into life, yet know so well how to judge of its proprieties, will take up with spirit, I flatter myself, the subject which I propose recommending to your observation. And as you are in a great measure the guardian of a world, whose inhabitants will one day largely contribute to fill up the various circles of higher life, any hints from a pen so peculiarly interesting as yours, must deeply impress their minds with the conviction of those truths you wish to inculcate.

My case will perhaps seem at first sight unworthy of serious consideration; but it has been very truly observed, by many very wise men, that there are trivial mortifications, which, being considered by the world as too insignificant for their pity, are, more particularly perhaps on that account, equally painful to the sufferer with the most serious misfortunes.

'The circumstances which I at present allude to, are the loud whispers, the half-suppressed fits of laughter, and those other nameless rudenesses, which are not so pointed as to bring a Jemmy Fellow into danger of a serious reprimand; but are generally too well understood by the victim of their raillery, and are very long and severely felt.-Perhaps I shall better elucidate my meaning by a candid recital of the particular affair which induced me to write to you, of which you will make what use you please; and grant generous allowances to the first female correspondent who claims your countenance and support.

'I have been educated very far from the gay and fashionable world; and my heart now palpitates at the recollection of what I felt, when on the morning of my eighteenth year my father offered me a journey to London. I accepted it with transport,

and I have actually been in town now a whole fortnight. It would be dull and uninteresting to give you an account of all the raptures I have felt at the variety of scenes, which have the powerful charm of novelty, added to all that is pleasing, to recommend them.

'An invitation to a ball awaited my arrival; and great was the metamorphosis made in my appearance, to qualify me for the very best company. After a last look of approbation at my glass, I had scarcely courage to encounter my father's eye with a sight so new to him. I hesitated as I entered the room; he surveyed me with a look of mingled affection and surprise; my huge muff fell from my hand, and appeared to me at that moment more formidable than the animal could have done to whom it originally belonged. By an approving smile, however, from my father, the muff was reinstated in my favour; the whim of my cap was changed into taste; the feathers droop more gracefully than ever; and I adjusted my handkerchief in perfect good humour with its enlarged and extended size. Thus self-complacent, my mind was left at ease to dwell upon the delightful expectations I had formed from the ball. My watch surely beat more tedious hours than when I was in the country. The moment however at last arrived. I entered the room full of a thousand pleasing chimeras; and as I felt a warm animated glow of partiality for every body I saw, I never once conceived but they all felt a reciprocal lively prepossession in my favour.

While the lady of the house was introducing me to the circle of her friends, and my heart was exulting with joy not to be described, a smart welldressed beau tripped up to a lady near me, and significantly repeated, in a loud whisper,

So stiff, so mute, some statue you would swear,
Stepp'd from its pedestal to take the air.

'I turned suddenly round and caught his eye, a titter followed, and in one moment I was humbled to the dust. Judge of my sensations; confused, mortified, and all my hopes of pleasing flown. In vain I endeavoured to recover my cheerfulness; my partner was pleasing and attentive: but the frightful figure, who had thus put me out of humour with myself, came so often near me in the dance, and his odious rhyme so jingled in my ears, that it was to no purpose I reasoned against those feelings, which the consciousness of guilt itself could hardly have increased.

Pray tell me, my dear Sir, where do people derive the right to trifle with the ease and comfort of others? The advantages of fortune and education, which this gentleman, I find, may boast of, were no advantages to me. They might have been extremely pleasing, had they induced him to behave with common propriety to a person (said to be handsome), certainly young, and a stranger, and who. could not therefore possibly have offended him.

'As good breeding is founded on good sense, and clearly meant to prevent uneasy feelings, should there not be some badge worn by those gentlemen who defy laws it is so much to the interest of society to revere, that we may know how to escape their insults? I will not say that a highwayman would frighten me less with a pistol pointed at my breast; but I am certain I could forgive him sooner. The one is an open attack, from which, if you can, you may defend yourself; in the other case there is. no temptation, but from the hope of giving pain, and witnessing the cruel effects of it-a pleasure which I do not recollect that Milton has ascribed to his fallen angels.

'Let me hope then, that you, Sir, will bestow some salutary admonitions on persons of this description; and will take the trouble to inform them,

that the behaviour, of which I complain, is utterly unworthy of a gentleman; of a man of honour, courage, and benevolence.

I am, dear Sir, with the greatest respect,
Your humble servant, a mortified,

COUNTRY GIRL.'

That I may as much as possible fulfil the desire of my fair correspondent, I shall subjoin, for the information and edification of all whom it may concern of the great and little world, the following resolutions, passed in a COMMITTEE appointed for the purpose of investigating all manners, customs, and behaviour, of children, of what kind or denomination

soever.

GREGORY GRIFFIN, Esq. in the Chair,
Resolved unanimously,

I. That the being able to say by heart two or more lines of Pope, or any other poet or author whatsoever, does not constitute a pretty fellow, wit, or satirist.

II. That it is the opinion of this Committee, that wilfully and maliciously to insult the feelings of an inoffensive and unprotected female, is, in the extreme, mean, cowardly, and ungenerous.

MR. GRIFFIN then leaving the Chair,

It was resolved,

That the thanks of this Meeting be given to the Chairman for his active, candid, and impartial conduct.

MR. GRIFFIN then resumed the Chair,

And it was Resolved,

I. That this Committee do continue to sit on every business, complaint, or application, of what

kind soever that is laid before the MICROCOSMOPOLITAN; and strictly and impartially do examine, investigate, and determine, on the same.

II. That the Resolutions of this COMMITTEE be printed in the Microcosm.

Signed by the Chairman, GREGORY GRIFFIN, Chairman.

No 15. MONDAY, MARCH 5, 1787.

Discordia semina rerum.-OVID.
Discordant matter.

THE first of the following letters I insert, as well on account of its intrinsic merit, as because it contains a request, with which I think it my duty to comply; and its own appearance will be not a little serviceable towards promoting the wish of its author. The second claims my attention, as it practically illustrates, in a manner very striking, a proposition I have before laid down, namely, the ill effects arising from intemperate joking.

SIR,

'TO GREGORY GRIFFIN, Esq.

London, February, 1787. 'As the motive which has induced you to undertake your justly-admired work, seems chiefly the good of your fellow-citizens; and as the plan upon which you profess to conduct it, is so truly liberal, I am assured that a hint from whatever quarter, will not fail to meet with a favourable reception. Your illustrious predecessors, the Spectator, Rambler, &c. &c. were so famous for their candid and disinterested conduct in this particular, that they