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fort, that their Satisfaction will be as great in this Way, as in the ordinary and coarfer Communication with Man; which indeed the Fondness that Ladies have always expreffed for Zephyrs, abundantly proves, though hitherto they have been ignorant of the Caufe of the agreeable Senfations excited by that amorous Wind.

But the most capital Advantage of all remains yet to be told, and in defcribing of this I must exalt my Style;

Major rerum mihi nascitur ordo,

Majus opus moveo.

There is a certain Distemper most fatally epidemic, which has much employed the Speculation, and more the Practice, of Mankind. Whether with Physicians we call it the Lues Venerea, with 'Pothecaries the Venereal Disease, with Ladies the French Diftemper, or with fine Gentlemen the P-x; it is known by all these Denominations, befides an infinite Number of inferior Titles, that mark the feveral Stages of this puif. fant, destroying Peftilence.

Nomina mille,

Mille nocendi artes.

Some tell you that Columbus brought it over from his new American World in a Ban-box; and that it is nothing more than the Yaws operating differently upon European Conftitutions [b]. O

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[b] However fome People may contend for the modern Introduction of this Diftemper, I am perfuaded it is as old as the Days of Hercules, and that this illuftrious Giant-killer was infected with it. The envenomed Shirt

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thers are contented to go no farther for it than France; and very confidently affure us, that it was imported hither among other elegant Accomplishments, for which we have been indebted to that Land of Luxury and Refinement. But though its Origin be doubtful and uncertain, its Atchievements are unquestionably fure; and, oh, that I had the Pen of Fracaftorius to describe the Ravage it commits upon a human Body! Lend, lend me Affiftance, all ye battered Rakes, while with blackest Ink I undertake to paint the Havocks of) that honourable Disease, of which thousands of your Fore-fathers have died, and whereof yourfelves fo vain-gloriously boast in Taverns and Coffee-houses, to the great Advancement of Virtue and Morality. Say, illustrious and

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for ye know, with what fatal Rapidity its Venom over-runs the Conftitution, how it undermines the Teeth, unhinges the Nofe, foddens the Flesh, strikes Rottenness to the Bones, and poisons the very spinal Marrow. Say, farther, moft enviable Sons of Pleafure! for this alfo Ex*perience may have taught you, how it spreads by Contagion, and operates by Communication. Some. Husbands give it their Wives, and fome Wives* give their Hufbands. Nor does the Evil end with Life, but revives again in the Posterity, is entailed on the Heirs of great Families, inherited in fure Succeffion, and oftentimes, too often, proves the of Neffus, and the Torments he fuffered by putting it on, are plainly a Poetic Allegory, which I interpret in the following eafy Manner.Neffus p--x'd his Whore, and the p-x'd Hercules.

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only thing that is inherited by Heirs of noble, but corrupted Blood. Hence arifes an enervated Progeny, weak in their Perfons, and weaker in their Understandings; a puny, ill-compounded, manly Race, who bear about them the Marks of their Fathers Wickedness in most legible Characters; and though liable to be blown away by. every Blast of Wind, have the Arrogance to ftrut through the Mall with Swords by their Sides, and fancy themfelves Men. Alas! their Mothers Chambermaids would make better Men.'

Non bis juventus orta parentibus·
Infecit aquor fanguine Gallico.

Now this Distemper, fo terrible in its Effects, and fo pernicious in its Confequences, has been attacked for many Centuries, by all the Efculapian Art in vain; [] Mercury has exhaufted all its fruitlefs Powers; Salivations exerted their cleanfing Influence without Effect; and the mighty Ward, with his illuftrious Pill, fits despairing in an Elbow-chair at Whitehall, to find himself defeated by this invincible Difeafe. But what neither phyfical Prescriptions, nor chirurgical Operations, what neither Empirics with their Pills,' nor Graduates of the Faculty with their Purges, have been able to accomplish; I pretend to perform in a safe, easy, effectual Manner, abfit fuperbia dicto) and for ever to drive out the P-x from his Majesty's Dominions. If all in female

[i] Cæfar tells us our old British Ancestors worshiped Mercury above all the Gods, Deum maxime Mercurium colunt, &c. Their modern Defcendants ftill worship the fame Deity.

Shape

Shape (for I dare not call them all Women) will agree to feclude themselves from the foul Em braces of Men for one Year (which I account a very modest Proposal, as I offer them a better Gratification in lieu of what they are toi forfeit) this ruinous Plague muft ceafe from among us. And I humbly recommend it, with all due Submiffion, to the Judgment and Confideration of the most honourable the L-ds of the P, C. whether a R-1 Edict would not be well employed, to forbid all Copulation throughout the Kingdom for the Space of one whole Year; beginning from Lady-day next, in order to ftop the Growth and Increase of a Contagion much more fatal than that which now fweeps away our horned Cattle, and equally deferving the Interpofition of Authority.

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But Objectors ftill may be apt to question, whether your double-diftill'd Children, who pafs through the feminal Veffels of both Sexes in the old Way of Generation, are not of Course more healthy and vigorous, than your fingle-diftill'd Infants will be, who are to receive only the Nurture of a female Womb? In Confutation of which filly Prejudice, though I could produce feveral very cogent Arguments from the Depth of Philofophy, yet I choose to answer this Query by another; Whether the prefent Race of Fathers, efpecially those in high Life, under the Circumftances I have defcribed, are qualifyed to beget Children at all? But, when, Women are left to breed of themselves, and the Venereal Disease is banished from among us, we may then hope to

fee

fee an Offspring robust and healthy; British Valour will then recover its ancient Glory; new Creffys, new Agincourts, new Blenheims fucceed to grace our Annals,

Nor Henry be the laft that conquers France.

Wherefore, not doubting but my Scheme will immediately take Place, I fhall apply very foon for a Patent to secure to myself the fole Advan-" tage of this Difcovery; and in the mean Time I have taken a Houfe in the Hay-market, dans la marché au foin, where I fhall give Attendance to all Women defirous of breeding, from the Hours of Seven or Eight in the Evening, till Twelve at Night; and if they will quietly submit themselves to my Experiment, I will enfure their Pregnancy at the proper Time, calculating from the Hour they did me the Favour of their Visit. Let them confider that the Glory and Interest of Great-Britain are now incumbent upon them, that it is in their Power to raise our Vigour, and, as I may fay, to mend the Breed of Englishmen. In fo doing, their Names will be recorded in History, as the illuftrious Propagators of Heroism, the Founders of a new Se&t of Men, and be handed down to Pofterity equally famous with the Spartan and Roman Ladies, whose many gallant Atchievements for the Good of their Countries, in Times of Diltrefs, engaged Poets and Hiftorians in their Praise.

But principally and earnestly I address myself to you, Gentlemen of the Royal Society, who fbine in the Dignity of F. R. S. and I hope you will re

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