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KNAVE

They're putting down their names for fear they should forget

them before the end of the trial.

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A nice muddle their slates will be in before the trial's over.

QUEEN

There's a pencil squeaking. Cut it down!

JURORS

[In chorus as they write.]

Squeaking

KING

[Wears a crown over his wig; puts on his spectacles as he

says.]

Herald, read the accusation!

WHITE RABBIT

[Blows three blasts on his trumpet, unrolls parchment scroll and reads to music.]

The Queen of Hearts, she made some tarts,

All on a summer day;

The Knave of Hearts, he stole those tarts,
And took them quite away!

KING

Consider your verdict!

WHITE RABBIT

Not yet, not yet; there's a great deal to come before that.

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[Comes in with a teacup in one hand and a piece of bread and butter in the other.]

I beg your pardon, your Majesty, for bringing these in, but I hadn't quite finished my tea when I was sent for.

KING

You ought to have finished; when did you begin?

HATTER

[Looks at the MARCH HARE, who follows him arm-in-arm

with the DORMOUSE.]

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Fourteen, fifteen, sixteen forty-five. Reduce that to shillings

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I keep them to sell. I've none of my own. I'm a hatter.

QUEEN OF HEARTS

[Puts on her spectacles and stares at HATTER, who fidgets uncomfortably.]

Give

KING

your evidence and don't be nervous, or I'll have you executed on the spot.

[The HATTER continues to shift nervously from one foot to the other, looks uneasily at the QUEEN, trembles so that he shakes off both of his shoes, and in his confusion bites a large piece out of his teacup instead of the bread and butter.]

HATTER

I'm a poor man, your Majesty, and I hadn't but just begun my tea not above a week or so and what with the bread and butter getting so thin- and the twinkling of the tea

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The twinkling of what?

KING

HATTER

It began with the tea.

KING

Of course twinkling begins with a T. Do you take me for a

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