Why deck these sculptur'd trophies of the tomb?
Why, victims, garland thus the spoiler's fane?
Hope ye by these t' avert oblivion's doom;
In grief ambitious, and in ashes vain?
Go, rather, bid the sand the trace retain,
Of all that parted virtue felt and did!
Yet powerless man revolts at ruin's reign;
Hence blazon'd flattery mocks pride's coffin lid;
Hence tower'd on Egypt's plains the giant pyramid.
Sink, mean memorials of what cannot die!
Be lowly as the relics ye o'erspread!
Nor lift your funeral forms so gorgeously,
To tell who slumbers in each narrow bed,
I would not honour thus the sainted dead;
Nor to each stranger's careless ear declare
My sacred griefs for joy and friendship fled.
O, let me hide the names of those that were,
Deep in my stricken heart, and shrine them only there!
ODE TO GLORY.
[From the same.]
QUEEN of the dazzling face and laurell'd brow,
Hail Glory! powerful goddess of the human mind,
To whom all ages and all nations bow,
And seek around their heads thy wreath to bind.
Each varied art to thee its tribute pays,
And seeks from thee the meed of fame,
The votary's trophy on thy shrine to raise,
And in thy temple to inscribe his name.
Thine is the statesman's vow, the poet's dream;
Proud chieftains suppliant worship in thy splendid fane,
Thy bright reward is still each sage's theme,
And music wakes for thee her sweetest strain.
Illustrious names thy records bright unfold,
That makes the soul of man desire
Conspicuous there to see his name enroll'd,
Circled around with unconsuming fire.
Virtue is ever found with thee to bide,
Thy temple's guardian, keeper of its hallow'd bound; And none can enter through the portals wide 'Till they permission from her voice have found. Though power and kindred lend their mighty aid, The base and wicked vainly strive
Her radiant eye to shun, her search evade,
And find an entrance which she does not give.
Wide wasting Conquest earns no meed from thee;
Ambition glorying stern in Freedom's trampled cause,
And dark browed Tyranny's despotic deed,
Repulse awaits, and shame from virtue's laws.
A heavier lot, a worse disgrace is theirs ;
Their names are written on the fatal scroll,
Which withering Ignominy ever bears,
Till circling ages shall have ceas'd to roll.
YANKEE WIT.
[From the same.]
THE YANKEE CHARCOAL MAN;
OR, DIFFERENCE BETWEEN GREATEST PART AND BEST PART.
YANKEES, who trade, must be surveyed,
Aud watch'd their words and phizes;
Or, ten to one, they'll make a pun,
Or banter you with quizzes.
A Yankee smart, with charcoal cart,
Being ready at a joke, sir,
Was ask'd what kind, one there might find
And says, 66 best part on't 's oak, sir."
"That must be true," quoth one in view,
"But though it looks so fine, sir,
Your price is high; I cannot buy ;
The greatest part is pine, sir."
THE GOOD-NATURED BULLY.
Two teamsters, with their teams, one day,
Chanc'd on the road to meet ;
And neither, as the sailors say,
Would start a tack or sheet.
But soon, to end the tedious jest,
The stouter and the taller,
In threatening posture, thus addrest
The shorter and the smaller.
Resisting, I should be an ass;
So I shall make despatch."
So said, so done.
"Now since I've pass'd,
Because you would compel me; How you that other man harrass'd Be good enough to tell me."
"With all my heart. The rogue d'ye see, So obstinate his whim,
I found would not turn out for me;
So I-turn'd out for him."
LEE'S PILLS; alias, CONNECTICUT SABBATH-KEEPING.
"TWAS on the eve of Saturday,
A man was very sick,
Fearing" of all the earth the way;"
So calls a doctor quick.
The doctor came and pills prescrib'd,
Took fee, and bade good night,
But the long night, and all next day,
The patient toss'd and groaning lay,
In a most painful plight.
On Monday morn the patient sent
For doctor quick to come and see him;
Immediately the doctor went,
And found the pills began to free him.
Quoth Bolus, sir, you might have known,
That you must wait till Monday;
They're Lee's pills, from Connecticut;
They'll never work on Sunday."
THE HORSE WITHOUT A FAULT.
A YANKEE jockey, shrewd and witty,
Once said, it was a wondrous pity,
'Twas made a sin from truth to vary;
For jockies found it necessary.
Some consciences, not wholly "sear'd,"
To tell a downright lie have fear'd;
Yet held to mental reservation,
And cheated by equivocation.
'Twas in a dark Egyptian night,
A jockey sold a horse outright,
Swearing the beast was mighty clever,
And had no single fault whatever.
Next morn, as soon as daylight shin'd,
The buyer found one eye stone-blind;
So to the seller raging goes,
Deals out hard words, and threatens blows.
Friend," quoth the latter, "be contented, The horse I truly represented;
For to be lame, or blind, or halt,
Is a misfortune-not a fault."
THE HORSE WITH TWO FAULTS.
My horse will seldom find his match;
Only two faults in him I bought :
He's very difficult to catch-
And good for nothing, when he's caught.
THE HONEST HORSE.
My horse, in honesty, beats all;
'Tis true, if you'll believe me ;
Threaten's, whene'er I drive, to fall-
And never does deceive me.
THE JOKING CRIMINAL.
THE human heart may grow so callous,
To fear not God, nor man, nor gallows.
The jokes of some you cannot check,
But by the breaking of the neck.
A culprit was to Tyburn carted,
To have his soul and body parted,
But found a tavern in his route,
And for a glass of grog sung out.
'Twas brought and drunk without delay,
And thus the rogue was heard to say,
"When I come back, I'll call and pay.”
BORROWER AND LENDER.
A MAN there was, would always lend
A trifle to a neighbouring friend.
Among the rest, he lent to one
A rusty, foul, ill-looking gun.
The borrower scolded him severely,
Conceiving it an insult, clearly.
"Sir," said the lender, "would you try
A better, you may go and buy:
I can't afford, you know, my friend,
To keep a better one to lend."
PROJECTORS may try
To make machines fly,
And keep a perpetual clatter;
When all's done and said,
Each projector's dull head
Proves the true vis inertia of MATTER.
LIBERTY AND EQUALITY.
AT his shop door, one standing nigh
The street, spit on a passer-by;
Who cried, in a most angry fit,
"While I pass by, how dare you spit?"
"Pray," quoth the first with equal brass,
"How, while I spit, dare you to pass?"
THE HONORABLE PEDAGOGUE.
A SCHOOLMASTER once-'tis an uncommon case-
Had a Dun ask for payment, with resolute face,
So thought the best method to take was to say
He'd pay upon honour" of grace the third day."
The third day arriv'd, when, depend on't, the Dun
As punctual came, as our good friend the Sun;
And in goodnatur'd way, ask'd the master to tell,
If with or without the u honour he'd spell.
The master, at this time, was cheerful and funny,
Having gather'd some wit, and collected some money;
So pays down the cash, and says, now sir 'tis true,
I spell the word honour, without the o u."
LEAVING OFF DRINKING.
A NEIGHBOUR once, a real friend,
Besought Tom Toddynose his life to mend ;
Asserting 'twas by all declar'd,
The aforesaid Tom drank much too hard.
"Too hard," cries Tom," that I deny ; None drink more easily than I.
But since of late I've understood,
The habit does more hurt than good,
Costs money, makes the neighbours scoff,
In fact, I've wholly left it off:
And, if you doubt that I have done,
At once I'll prove it by my son."
The boy was call'd, and told, in language civil,
To speak plain, honest truth, and shame the devil,
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