But I'm sure I deserve the attention
Of "the handsomest man in the room."
Yes, I know I deserve the attention,
Of the "handsomest man in the room."
When I met that sublimest of fellows,
The sight really made my heart jump;
Other men shrank to mere punchinellos,
As he towered like a pine in a clump.
So noble and classic each feature,
With a touching expression of gloom,
That I said to myself "The dear creature!
He's the handsomest man in the room!"
"Yes!" I said to myself,-"The dear creature!
He's the handsomest man in the room!"
He asked me if I'd walk a measure,
(When he came it was nearly midnight)—
I said "With a great deal of pleasure,'
For he danced like a perfect delight.
So in waltzing and polking we sported,
Till supper sent forth its perfume,
And I went down to table, escorted
By "the handsomest man in the room
Yes, I went down to table, escorted
By "the handsomest man in the room."
I thought 'twas a nice situation,
So snugly together we sat,
And in hopes of a pleasant flirtation,
I tried to engage him in chat.
But, to talk of himself never backward,
He strove modest airs to assume,
For he told me, he felt very awkward
As "the handsomest man in the room
Really, really, one does feel so awkward,
As "the handsomest man in the room!"
Thought I-"This is really too stupid!
Your good looks are very well known,
But you ought to know, Grenadier Cupid,
That I'd much rather hear of my own.'
Yet should he reform in this one thing
(Of which there are hopes, I presume),
We still may contrive to make something
Of the handsomest man in the room,
Yes, we still may contrive to make something
Of the handsomest man in the room.
William Macquorn Rankine.
THE LAWYER'S INVOCATION TO SPRING
HEREAS, on certain boughs and sprays
Now divers birds are heard to sing,
And sundry flowers their heads upraise,
Hail to the coming on of Spring!
The songs of those said birds arouse
The memory of our youthful hours,
As green as those said sprays and boughs,
As fresh and sweet as those said flowers.
The birds aforesaid—happy pairs—
Love, 'mid the aforesaid boughs, inshrines In freehold nests; themselves their heirs, Administrators, and assigns.
O busiest term of Cupid's Court,
Where tender plaintiffs actions bring,Season of frolic and of sport,
Hail, as aforesaid, coming Spring!
RECOLLECT a nurse call'd Ann
Who carried me about the grass,
And one fine day a fine young man
Came up and kiss'd the pretty lass.
She did not make the least objection!
Thinks I, "Aha!
When I can talk I'll tell Mamma'
And that's my earliest recollection.
Frederick Locker-Lampson.
In Cité Fadette;
Maison Pons can make splendid
Brioche and galette.
M'sieu Pons is so fat that
He's laid on the shelf; Madame had a Cat that' Was fat as herself.
Long hair, soft as satin,
A musical purr,
'Gainst the window she'd flatten Her delicate fur.
I drove Lou to see what
Our neighbours were at,
In rapture, cried she, "What
An exquisite cat!
"What whiskers! She's purring
All over. Regale
Our eyes, Puss, by stirring
Thy feathery tail!
"M'sieu Pons, will you sell her?"
"Ma femme est sortie,
Your offer I'll tell her;
But will she?" says he.
Yet Pons was persuaded
To part with the prize:
(Our bargain was aided,
My Lou, by your eyes!)
From his légitime save him,-
My spouse I prefer,
For I warrant his gave him
Un mauvais quart d'heure.
I am giving a pleasant
Grimalkin to Lou,
—Ah, Puss, what a present
I'm giving to you!
Frederick Locker-Lampson.
ICCADILLY! Shops, palaces, bustle, and breeze,
The whirring of wheels, and the murmur of
trees;
By night or by day, whether noisy or stilly,
Whatever my mood is, I love Piccadilly.
Wet nights, when the gas on the pavement is streaming,
And young Love is watching, and old Love is
And Beauty is whirling to conquest, where shrilly Cremona makes nimble thy toes, Piccadilly!
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