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But one, that is, "through stration of the forty seventh proposition, first
Sesquipedulin. Da reniam ; that is, pardon Sesquipedalin. In rerilole; that is, to It was merely a lapsus lingua; that truth, it bappened forte; that is, by chance.
Trill. (Talking to himself.) If B be dale Digit. Well, sir, I am not fond of lapsus me is in E. lingues at all, sir. However, if you did not Digit. Ay, sir, this is only an integral part mean to offend, I accept your apology. I wish of your conduct, ever since you came into this Mr. Morrell would come.
house. You have continued to multiply your Sesquipedaliu. But, sir, is your work upon insults in the abstract ratio of a scometrical mathematics?
progression, and at last lave proceeded to Digit. Yes, sir. In this manuscript I have violence. The dignity of Archimedes Digit endeavored to elucidate the squaring of the never experienced such a reduction descenda circle.
ins, before. Sexquipedalia. But, sir, a square circle is Trill
. [To himself.) Twice fare, soi, lum, a contradiction in terms. You cannot make and then comes me again.
Digit. If Mr. Morrell does not admit me Digit. I perceive you are a novice in this suon, I'll leave the bouse, wbile my head is sublime sciente. The object is, to find a on my shoulders. square which shall be equal to a given circle, Trill. Gentlemen, you neither keep time which I have done, by a rule drawn from the nor chord. But if you can sing, we may carry radii of the circle and the diagonal of the a trio before we go. Saare. And, by my rule, tbe area of the
Scsquipedalia. Can you sing an ode of square will equal the area of the circle. Horace or Anacreon. I should like to bear Sesquipedulin. Your terms
one of them. incomprehensible. Dragonul is derived from
. I you . the Greek--de-n and the corner."
see what it bas to co with a circle ; for, if I understand aright, Trill. I never heard of those composers, a circle, like a sphere, has no corners.
sir; where do they belong? Digit. You appear to be very ignorant of Sesquipedalia. They did belong to Italy the science of numbers. Your life must be and Greece. very insipidiy spent in poring over philosophy Trill. Ah! Italy! there are our best and the dai lausayes. You never tasied, masters-Correlli, Vorrelli, and Fuseli. Can as I have, the pleasure arising from the you favor me with their compositions ? investigation of an insoluble problem, or tlie Sexquipedalia. Oh, yes, if you have a taste discovery of a new rule in quadratic equa- that way. I can furnish you with them, and tione.
, Sallost, Cicero, Casar, Quintijan; Sequipela!ia. Po! po! [Turns round in and I have an old Greek Lexicon that I can disgust, and luts Digit with his cnne.]
spare. Digit. 0!, you villnin!
Trill. Ad libitum, my dear sir; they will Ssquiped tha. I wislı, sir
make a handsome addition to my musical Digil. And so do I wish, sir, that that library. cane was raised to the fourth power, and laid Digit. But, sir, what pretensions have you over your hend as many times as there are to the patronage of Mi. Morrell? I don't units in a thousand. Oi! oh!
believe you can square the circle. Sesquipedalu. Did my cane come in
Sequipedalia. Nor prove the infinite contact with the sphere of repulsion around divisibility of matter. your shin? I must confess, sir (Enter Trill. Pretensious, sir! I have gained a Trill. Oh, Tere is Mr. Morrell. Salte, victory over the great Tantamarrarra, the new Jomini! sir, vour most obedient.
opera singer, who pretendeid 10 vie with me. Trill. Which of you, gentlemen, is Mr. 'Twas in ihe symphony of Handel's Oratorio Morrell?
of Saul, where, you know, every thin depends Sesquizredalia. Oh, neither, sir. I took upon the limpo giusto, and where the promo you for that gentleman.
should proceed in smorzando, aud the secondo Trill. No, sir, I am a teacher of music. in agitato. But he was on the third leger line. Flute, harp, viol, violin, violoncello,* organ, or I was an ortave below, when, with a sudden any thing of the kind, any instrument you can appowgialura, I rose to D in alt., and conmention. I have just been displaying my quered bim. powers at a concert, and come recommended
[Enter Drone) to the patronaze of Mr. Morrell.
Drone. My master says how he will wait Sequipe talia. For the same purposc are on you, genilemen. that gentleman and mysell here.
Digit. What is your name, sir ? Digil. (Sull rubbing his shin.] Ol! oh! Drone. Drone, at your service.
Tril. Has the gentleman the gout? I have Digit. No, no; you need not drone at my heard of its being cured by music. Shall I service. A very applicable name, bowever. sing you a tane? Hem! Hem! 7610
Sexquipedalia. Drone? That is derived Digal. No, lio I want none of your tuncs. from the Greek draon, flying or moving I'd inake that piilosopher sin though, and swiftly. dance too, if he hadn't made a cultur fruction
Trill. He rather seems to move in anden! of my 106
measure; tlint is, to the tune of Old Ilured
Drone. Very likely, gentlemen.
Digit. Well, as I came first, I will entor, with a Besides, I think he does not shape first.
the tail of his Gs as I should. Sesepipedalia. Right. You shall be the Mr Quiddle. Perlaps, if you were to auteccdent, I the subsequent, and Mr. Till mention these important objections to Mr. B., the consequent.
he would obviate ibem at once
For my part. Trill. Righi. I was always a man of I wish the recess was licice as long As to consequence. Faw, sot, law; law, sol, &c. &c. the letter G, I did not know that its tail had (Singing as he goes oul.] (F. F. D) any precise length.
Mr. Quiddle. You have much to learn 756. PRECISESESS.- AR. AND MRS. QUIDDLE.
Mrs. Quiddle. By the way, I noticed. to day. Mr. Quidille. My dear, notwithstanding all that Joseph called you mother, and you did I have said, Molly has builed one potutoe not reprimand him. more than I directed to-day.
Mrs. Quiddle. Reprimand him! Mrs. Quddle. Mr. Quiddle should have Mr. Quiddle. Such fainiliarity will lesscu, attended to this great concern himself. if not destroy, your authority over him. In he
Mr. Quiddle. No, my dear, it is your duty were to call me father, I should chastise bim. to do so; and though it pains me to complain Ms. Quidule. Poor boy! there is no fear of any nezlect ot yours, a sense of duty of his being chastised, then ; for he does los compels me to say, that the last quarter of feel towards you as if you were his father. pound of tea has disappeared much 100 Mr. Quiddle. I like to preserve a whole. rapidly. There were twenty-five thimblefuis, some distance, that he may pay me proper and we have made tea but twenty four times, respect. by my memorandum.
Mrs. Quiddle. The respect of fear cannot Ms. Quiddle. Indeed, Mr. Quiddle, you be relied on; and such overnicety calculate very closely. Perhaps Molly's thimble Mr. Quiddle. Do you know ihal, to what is larger than yours; but I do not think the you call my overnicety, I owe all шу
health matter worth a moment's consideration.
and wealth ? Mr. Quiddle. Aye, there lies your error. Mrs. Quiddie. i know. that, to preserve No man can be exact in great things who does your health, you have sacrificed the happiness, not attend to /rifles. A om constitute worlds, and to accuraulate your wealth, you bave my dear, and give a form to them. Aud. now forfeited the respect, of all around you. I think ot' it, you gave Joseph seven spoontuls Mr. Quidilie. Can it be that you of soup to day, when you know, I uever allow serious ? hiin but sic.
Mrs. Quiddle. I never was more so.
so. I Mrs. Quiddle. He was very hungry, and have told you the truth, at the risk of your one spoonful could not hurt bim.
displeasure Alr. Quiddle. That is a futal mistake, my Áli. Quidule. Well, well--if it is so bad as dear.
that, I must alter my conduct. I will do so Mrs. Quiddle. Why, how do you know so from this moment. (Stoops and picks up a exactly how many spoustuls our boy cau prin) There, this is the fifth pini
, besides a contain?
headless oue, that I have picked up to-day! Mr. Qiidlle. My father never allo:ved his But, as I was saying, I intend to reformi. Oh, children but six, or six and a half, at the if you send Joseph to the shop, tell him not to
give fourpeuce half penny fur six cents; for Mrs. Quiddle. And your stomach is to you know, my dear, it 18 six cents and a regulate Joseph's! Well, poor boy! I do not quarier.- I certainly must watch my conduct. blame binn for disliking you.
But where is dinner? It is more than a Mr. Quiddle. The re'fare of my child mast minute after the time. My dear, do see to it.be consulteil, even if at the expense of his There is another pin! Well, it it amazing to affection. Now, I do not love to find fault, mehow careless some folks are! Mrs. Quiddle, but I observed that he did not change tell Molly to bring her thimble to me, that I bis shoes this morning. I never wore the may see whether it holds more than mine! came shoe on one foot two days in succes. I must think of what you told me. sion, in my life; it runs them down to the
(F. F. D.) heel.
757. THE VILLAGE SCHOOL. Mrs. Quiddle. I fear that your precision will so disgust Joseph, that he will rush to the other extreme; for I have often noticed, that
M28. WEATHERBOX. the Teacher. SCSANNA, an children who are denied all reasonable indul. Orphan that she has taken to bring up. Pupils-
CATHARINE RICI, LUCY II EART, MARIA SMALL, SARAH Bences are apt to become licentious. Mr. Quiddle. Joseph must be looked after. Suita, FANNY Mills, Maarua WELLS ; other smaller
Ross, AUBA Mix, 18ABEL Fox, MARY SPARE, JANE I intend, immediately, to send him to another Scholars, also. school.
Mrs. Quiddle. Why so, my dear? I thought (The scene represents a school-room, with desky, Mi. B. was an excellent teacher.
The scholars are talking Mr. Quiddle. He may be so, but he is not together, and waiting for the teucher's particular enough for our Joseph. Why, I
arriral.) understand, he allows his pupils a recess of Catharine. I GUESS, Susanna, your ugly con minuics, and even plays with them himself! old aunt is taking a nap after dinner, she My master allowed but five ininutes' recess. inakes it so lale. Had stie so.ething uncurnand would as soon have died as stoop to play / moniy nice for dinner ?
Susannn. She had a chicken, I believe; | (Mrs. Weatherbo.c's head begins to fall, as if but she gave me a long task, and told me to she was sleepy. Catharine gives a sign to stay here till I had done it.
Maria to leave off reading, and she herself Catharine. She did that to prevent your begins, but only makes a humming noise having any of the chicken-a stingy old thing! Um, um, um, um, &c. Mrs. Wentherbo.r, in
Susanna. I cannot believe that she would the mean time, lets her book fall from une be so selfish and unjust.
hand, and the apple from the other, and her Lucy. Why, I am sure it is just of a piece head falls on her shoulder.] with all her conduct towards you. She never Lucy [Going close up, and looking to ser gives you any thing fit to wear; and much as if she is actually asleep.)" Hush, girls! let her ever she alters her old, cast off rags, when she set well asleep before you stir. turus them over to you.
(Some move about on tiptoe, and all whisper.) Susanna. But she took me, when no one Sarah. I mean to rummage the old lady's else in the world would have done so; and I drawer, and see what she has stolen from the hope to get a tolerable education under her scholars. (She opens the table drauer and all care, although she is not always so kind to the scholars crowd round. Sarah says.) Here's ine as I try to deserve.
your cup and ball, Lucy. Now take it, and Lucy. You are too good by half, Susanna; hide it. Jane Smith, here is your picture. and I dare say now, you are half starved, book. She has been reading it first, to see while that selfish old creature is so full she whether it is a suitable book for you to read. can do nothing but sleep. Here, take this Mary Spare, here is your cake, that she was apple. I have had my dinner, and don't atraid would hurt you. Little girls' stomachs, want it.
like ours, cannot bear any rich food, you Susanna. I'thank you, Lucy; but my aun: know; and so she eats it for us ! told me I must not eat any thing till I had Lucy. Here is her old snuff box. Why is done iny task
not snuff as good as pepper and mustard, that Lucy. You must take it, my dear girl, or I she loves so dearly?" (She sprinkles sone shall be affronted. Your aunt only meant, snuff on the apple, and lays it on the table, that you must not cat any food that cosi her and says,] There, Susanna, she sball pay for any thing.
robbing you, if she eats any more of her Susanna. Well, I will eat it; for I am plunder. really faint.
Abba. Here is the fool's cap. Come, girls, Catharine. There she comes! I see her let's see if it becomes ma'am as well as it vid cap. Look out, girls! Run to your seats, does the rest of us. [She puts it upon Mrs. or you'll get it.
Weatherbot's head. She then doubles her fist The scholars all run, und sit as if afraid.] in the old lady's face, and says,] Eb! you Enter Mrs. Weather box, fanning herself, and ugly old thing! i'd put a pipe in your mouth, looking very cross.]
if it wouldn't wake you up! Mrs. Weatherbox. Susanna, how dare you (Isabel Fox puts on the old lady's spectacles rat that apple?
and, calling tro or three very small girl Susanna. I did not think you would object, around her, pretends to keep school, mimickma'am; it was a present from one of the ing the old lady.) scholars.
Catharine. Oh, here is her precious memo Mrs. Weatherboz. Present, indeed! I should randum-book! Come, girls, now for a treat! like to see how a present tastes. It does They say she writes all her secrets here. one's heart good to have a present now-a. Let's see. Here is a memorandum of what days; but the time was, when I bad a she intends to say at mother's party, to-vight. present every day.. [To Susanna.) Your I have heard that she always studies, before. apple forfeited, miss. (She takes it away, hand, some smart speeches. Now let's see. und begins to eat it herself.). Resume your Susanna. Miss Catharine, I beg you not seat, miss. Let the first class in reading to read that book. It is dishonorable to read
(She unlocks the drawer of her any writing that is not intended to be seen. table, while six stand up, three on each side Catharine. She has read my billets a of her.
hundred times; and tit for tat, I say. Mrs. Weatherbou. Maria Small, begin at Susanna. Let me entreat you to put back the 45th page, "On the Beauties of Nature." the memorardum-book.
Maria. (Reading very slowly and blunder. Catharin. Not I, indeed! It shall be read ingly.) "Although-the-moon-we-behold-is-an. in committee of the whole. So form a circle, OP. Q. body-like-our earth."
all hands of you, and told your tongues. Come, Mrs. Weatherbox. (Gaping.) What sort Susanna, you niust join cs. of a body did you call it ?
Susanna. Excuse me; I am unwilling to Maria. 0. P. Q., ma'am.
do any thing while niy auit is asleep, that I Mrs Weatherbo.z. Opaque, you mean. would not attempt if she were swake. The word means dark; and, dear me, how Lucy. You are altogether too scrupolous, dark the room is ! (She gapes again) I guess Suzy, dear. Do not try to make us believo iny specs want wiping. Go on with your you feel any great respect for such a cross old reading. (She wipes her spectacles.)
crone as this Maria. " Although the moon we behold is [The old lady moves one arm and Sarah an opaque body, still its surface is rendered
Ross says, visible to us, by the reflection of the sun's Sarah. Hush! she is waking. Run for light."
(AU scamper lo their seals, but she does not | What do you mean? I have been no moro
wake, and Catharine calls them around her asleep than you have. again)
Isabel. Then how did you lose your specCulkarine. Come, girls, let's have the treat. tacles, ma'am without knowing it?' Como, Suzy, you must hear it too.
Mrs. Weatherbox. I mark Miss Fox for Susanna. I really cannot join in what I impertinence. Go on with your reading. do not approve. Do, pray, give me the book, Maria į Maria reads, and while she is doing h..d let me put it back.
80, Mrs. Weatluerbo.r tiles the apple, and begins Catharine. No, no, not till we have had a to make faces and spit She then says,] taste of it She expects "to astonish the What's this? Snuff?" snuff? snuff on my natives" at our house to night, and I am apple? Who pat snuff on my apple ? delerinined, beforehand, to know what she is Lucy. Who could do so, ma'am, and you w suy. Now, Susanna, do not carry your all the time awake, and looking on? How or so far as to wake your aunt, and betray Catharine. Perhaps the apple touched 13 nil as soon as we begin. There she sits, for your snuff box, ma'am. Poor Susan did nut all the world like the Sleeping Beauty in the have a chance to see whether it tasted of Woods. (Making a face at her.]
snuff before you took it away from her. Susanna. What have you seen in me. Mrs. Weatherbor. I mark Miss Rich for Catharinc, to lead you to suspect that I could talking unnecessarily. Go on with your reauwe mean enough to betray you ?
ing, Maria, Maria reads a few words, and Cottharine. Well
, my dear girl, stand and Mrs. Weatherbox opens her drawer, and, scenes watch her, then, and give us a hint if she the confusion, says,) My stars ! who bas
Now for it! Reads.) "Memoran dared to touch my drawer! Somebody, I see dins for Mrs. Ricli's tea-party. To stir my has been here! Where is my memorandus Los a long time, that I may say to my next book ? Has any one dared to touch it! neighbor, 'I like to have all the composite Susanna, where is my memorandum book! parts of my beverage both saturated and (Susanna hides her face in her work, but it's coagulated."
Mrs. Weatherior rises, MrSa* " To fan myself, that I may say, 'How her by the arm, and says,] Now look me lui! sweetly the zephyrs of Boreas teinper the in the face, and say you did not take that boat of Phabus!""
memorandum book out of my drawer! Speak “ To tell the story of the man who ran his out, speak loud! bead against a shop-shade, and said, halt: Susanna. I did not, I did not, indeed! stunned by the blow, . What is that?' . That Mrs. Weatherbox. I do not believe you, is a conjunction,' said a school-boy, who was and shall make bold to search you. (She passing.”
thrusts her hands into Susanna's pockel, and "To speak French as often as I can, not draws out the memorandum-book, and holds it forgetting to mention the eclaw of Mrs. Rich's up, saying, (You did not take it, hey? You carriase; to allude to the fox-paw of Colonel , did not take it? What do yon say now? Trip, and the na-retle of Miss Catharine. If Susanna. (Sobling.) I did not take it no one leads me to the table, to say, ' Shakun from the drawer, ma'ain. power soy."
Mrs. Weatherbor. Then you know who Susanna, Hush! hush! she is waking! did. So tell me this instant. (Susanna does Mrs. Wea'herbot begins to moe a little. not answer.) know, then, you took it
and Catharine shuts the book, and says to yourself; it is exactly like you. Susanna,)
Susanna. Oh, aunt! it is not like me to Callariné. Pray, pray, put it into the do such a thing. drawer instantly. Run all, for your lives, to Mrs. Weatherbox. Not another word! I your seats.
shall believe you did it, will you cau prove your (One little girl stumbles over a cricket, and innocence by pointing out ihe culprit. But I makes so much nmse, that Mrs. Weatherboz am certain it was yourself
, and I shall punish arakes. The six readers sland in their you accordingly. I suppose you have taken places. Mrs. Weatherbox starts up, rubs care to read every word of it her eyes, and says,)
Susanna. I really did not read one line Airs. Weaiherbor. What's that noise ? of it. Dear me! I was beginning to lose myself. Mrs. Weatherbor. You did not read it? Maria, my dear, finish the sentence you were then why did you steal it? I'll punish you reading.
to your heart's content. You shall be shut up Catharine. I hope, ma'am, you will give in this room for a week, and shall have only Os some merits for keeping so still while you bread and water, and a short allowance of were taking your pap.
even that; and you shall sew on that bard Mrs. Weatherbox. Nap! nap! Who say linen froin morning till night, I promise you. I have been taking a nap? I have heard | Girls, you may all go home; school is dus. every word that has been read. Come, missed girls, go on with your reading. Let me see-[The girls go out. Susanna sils and sobs as where was the place? Wbere are my spec
she works.) acles ?
Mrs. Weather bor. There, now do not stir Isabel. Here, ma am. I was afraid they will I come back! Leave off crying, and mind would fall on the floor, and so I held them till your sewing. I shall not see you till morning you waked up
Susanna. Aunt, I assure you that I am Mrs. Weatlierbox.
Waked up, you mins! | innocent
Mrs. Weatherbox. A pretty story! Hold , but, madam, pupils have rights, and teachers your tongue, and mind your work. She goes mastrexpect them, if they wish to be respected. out.)
Susanna is beyond your reach, and I am in [Catharine enters on tiptoe.) your power. Punish me, if you think I deserve Catharine. My dear Susan, I wish you to it, for anticipating the wit you intended to let go home with ine.
me share freely at my mother's lea party. Susanna. My aunt has forbidden me to The memorandum will do yet; for I have not stir from this room, till she returns to morrow repeated the conjunction story, nor the Freuch, morning. I am so faint now that I can hardly to any soul living.
Mrs. Heatherior. Go bome, miss, and tell Catharine. Do you not think such treatment Susanna to come back immediately. cruel and unjust?
Catharine. Say you pardon her, then. Susanna. I do.
Mrs. Weatherbox. I do. Catharine. And yet you submit to it. Catharine. Say you will love and treat Susanna, I have no home but this. her well, as she deserves, poor girl!
Catharine. I will lend you one, for one Mrs. Wealherbo.z. I will. I am too much night, at least. My dear girl, you shall suffer mortified to be angry; and, for the first linic No more for my wickedness. It is my offence in my life, I am ready to confess to my pupils that you are to be punished for, and I am that I am in the wrong. Oh, how inuch determined to undergo the penalty myself. happiness I have lost in the foolish attempt to Now pot my shawl and bonnet on yourself
, make my pupils believe that my judgment and go home, and tell my parents that I have and conduct were always right! My dear changed beds with you for one night. Leave girl, you have set me a lesson to-day, that me here, and return in the morning.
will vever be forgotten. (Looking at the Susanna. You are not used to suffering, audience. It is singular, that taking a nap and I am used to nothing else.
sliould open my eyes so wide. Colharine. I am determined, and you must submit. There-don't speak. (Putting on
758. THE DEBATING CLUB. her things. There-go and enjoy, for one THE PRESIDENT, MR. BUNKER, MR. Kixg, MR. Bulle, night, at least. a happy home.
MR. VERNON, MR. SLOW MATCHI, MR. STEAMER, ME Susanna. What do you intend to do? BRANDYWINE, MR. York, Moxs. Bonjour, Mr. Jir
Catharine. No matter. Leave it to mc. TIMUS, MR. SLACK, MR. FAIRSIDE, SECRETARY. Go now, or your aunt may return and preventi The President and Secretary sitting at a table, you.
and the other memlers sealed around.) [Susanna goes mil.)
President. GENTLEMEN, the ordinary busi[Catharine sits at vork, with her head down. ness of the club having been performer, tbe Mrs. Weatherbox enters ]
next business in order will be the regular Mrs. Weatherbo.r. I forgot to say, that no debate. If you will give your attention, one will be permitted to speak to you for a gentlemen, the Secretary will read from the week; and I shall take the precaution to lock records the question to be discussed. the door, and keep the key myself. What Secretary. [Reads.) The subject prodiri Catharine Rich have to say to you? I met posed for discussion, at the next meeting, is, her as I came in
Which was the greater man, Washington or Cotharine. (Wilhout raising her head.] Lafayette?' On the side of Wa-lington, She came to say, that you were too cruel to Messrs. Bunker, King, Bull, Vernon, Slow. punish me, when she was the guilty oue. She match, and Steamer, were appointed; and, on i createns to tell her father, and ask him to the other side, Messrs. Brandy wine. York, adopt nie, and take us both from your school. Fairside, Bonjour, Mittimus. and Slack. Slin invited me to run home with her now. was also voted, that the next meeting slonia
Mrs. Weatherbor. Why didn't you go? be holden at - Hall, that tbe numerous
Catharine. I thought she would do the friends of the members might hear the dis errand best.
cussion without inconvenience. Mrs. "Featherbor, Highty-tighty! (Srizing Attest, JOHN SCRIP, Secretary." her arm, and tvilching her up on her feet.) President. You have heard the record,
Cailarine Touch me, if you dare, madam! gentlemen; and, if no objection is made, the Your persecuted prisoner has escaped. regular discussion of the proposed question
Mrs Weatherlor. Catharine Rich! What will commence. does this mean, miss?
Mr. Slack, Mr. President! Catharine. It means, madam. that I could President. Mr. Slack, gritlemen. Thot bear to see your innocent victim suffering Mr. Slack. (Very rapidly.) Mr. President for me; and I have persuaded her to take -I rise, sir, to say that, as every member, whelter with my parents, and leave me to be probably, has a desire to say someibing upon punished, if you dare to touch me. I took the ihe subject to be discussed this evening, and memorandum-book from your drawer, when some folks have not any too much control over you were asleep, sound asleep; in consequence / their tongues. will be but fair that no of cate your own portion of chicken and hers member be allowed to speak more than five also. She took it from me to restore it to you; minutes at one time. I have no fear but what but you awoke before she bad an opportunity I shall get my share of the time; but I speak to do so. The gencrous girl preferred to suffer, for the sake of others, sir, who may not be so rather than to exposé me. i know the respect fortunate; those, sir, who, like the lame man which is due from pupils to their teachers;' at Bethesda, wish to get into the troubled