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Sc.—“And makes thee plaguy ill. But come, take heart of grace,

and let us go see how quietly the Thames looks when C. J. LEWIS Scene-the Gallery. Viator is discovered with a catalogue in his hand, limneth it of a calm evening." staring wildly at the walls. To him enter SCRUTATOR.

V1.—“Aye, that is more to my taste, and minds me of the time

when I was wont to wet a line with good Manter Izaak Walton." SCRUTATOR.—“Give thee good den! Art studying these pictorial Sc.-"Here be noble moonlight passages in GILBERT's picture. What phantasies, Oh, VIATOR ?"

say you ?" VIATOR.—“Ay, marry, that am I. What think you of the show ?" Vi.-" It beseemeth me I have seen the like before, or what nearly

Sc.—"'Tis a passing good show, and such an one as I cannot resembleth it.” mind me to have seen this many a long day.”

Sc.-—"You must go look at DONALDSON's Roman view, if ye must V1.--" Here be hugely good painting, 'i' faith. I would I were needs have originality and novelty.” rich !"

V1.—“I took note of it but just now. It is ill placed, but 'tis brimSc.—"Nay, never be discontented ! But, come, we will make the full of truth and reality. It likes me much." grand tour of the Gallery. 'This Beau's Stratagem,' now, is a clever Sc.—“Where be the critics one is wont to meet at the private views, picture. 'Tis deftly limned, and the yellow velvet of the gallant's Master Viator? By my halidome, I have not clapt eyes on one this doublet is e'en excellent."

whole noontide.” V1.—“And the maiden's garb, too, is charming-who is the painter f” V1.—“ There be other galleries open privately this day, and since Sc.—“BARNES !"

they belong to dealers the critics have flocked thither.” V1.—“Not the Common evidentir-he's above that. Here now is Sc.-" Is it so? It seems it would be more becoming to do honour a noble work by COLE. Of a truth the sunlight is ably done." to a Society of Artists first, and go honour the dealers afterward."

Sc.—" It is. And, methinks, Ludovici hath well portrayed the V1.-—"Aye, marry; but Societies don't give dinners and bals seclusion of the cloister hero."

masques, the which your dealer doth at times." V1.—“He hath, of a truth. But did you mark another canvas by Sc. -"Say you so ? Then my faith in critics is like to come to Burr in yonder chamber, the presentment of a lad nursing his little diminishment.” brother?"

V1.—“Mine cannot be diminished.” Sc.—“It did not escape me. It is a prettily-conceived work. But Sc.—“How so?" there be some rare gems in the smaller apartments, notably a twilight V1.-"That is the point, which, as gossip Euclid putteth it, hath no by the sea, which BARNES hath painted.”

size nor magnitude.” V1.-“ 'Tis infused with the very spirit of true poesy. Dost not Sc.—“You are pleased to be satiric. But now let us go and drink think Thom paints well ? See the pilferers here in the orchard by beer. It is a performance full of pleasure after a picture-gallery." the river-side."

V1.-"Spoken like a philosopher. I am with you! Dost know a Sc.—“Good, truly. And these other marauders by PASQUIER. But handy hostel ?” let us not pass by the Contested Election,' set down with skill by 8o.—“Within a petronel's shot of this. What say you of the RITCHIE. 'Tis an artful bit of work. But what ails you? Are you gallery as a whole ? smit with the falling sickness ?”

V1.-" The best exhibition I have seen here this age. But see what V1.—“ Lead me hence, I prithee!". (Viator leads him away. a capital collection of water-colours we have yonder? Sc.—“What has affected thee so strangely?".

Sc.—“'Tis a capital gathering, and one that might run alone instead V1.—“I am no sailor, good SCRUTATOR, and the right of that sea of following on the heels of the other department." as Hayes hath painted it hath made me as qualmish as if I were V1.—" It might, of a verity. But we must not linger." aboard a Margate boat. The fellow paints ocean pestilently well !" Sc.—“Have with you!”


Lo...on: Pructed by JUDD & GLASS, Pha'uix Works, St. Andrew's Hill, Doctors' Commons, and Published (for the Proprietor) by W. AI DER, at 80, Fleot-street, E.C.

April 13, 1867.

What do I care if it's MILDRED or MILLICHAT ?

Milly's your pet and diminutivo namo-
Casual glances to torture or kill I sent,

Language of looks is a dangerous game.
Friends we were both when our silly eyes met, you know,

Only a night ago, still it's absurd,
Knowing we've heard of each other, and yet, you know,

Neither exchanged a soft whisper or word.
Conventionalities preached by society,

Cannoned against us and left us in “ baulk;"
Gave us of chattering friends a satiety,

When we were longing to cut them and talk.
Classical fable has told us of TANTALUS,

Trying for ever to moisten his lips ;
Bother the simile-shadows that mantle us,

Warn us that fate is unsteady and trips.
Love, like the Danaïd daughters or Dryades,

Sports, or with water fills treacherous jars,
Better exist like the fabulous Pleiades-

Doves for a moment and afterwards stars!
Facts we shall find leave a nauseous sediment,

Fancies are better a thousand times o'er;
Were we to meet you might fall from your pediment,

I might in turn prove a horrible bore.


Why by the name of “ Peacock's tail,"
A certain party they should hail,

Can cause us no surprise !
Each individual opinion,
Sets up for separate dominion-

It's all made up of “I's."
But where so many leaders are,
Would it not wiser be, by far,

To call it "Heads and Tails ?”
Or let us call it “Cranborne Alley,"
The cave whence issues many a sally

That Government assails.
Oh, no! The Peacock title's best-
There is prophetic interest

With that description blent;
For should the Ministry go out
The Peacock party,

past a doubt,
Will be peahen-itent !

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wall, lock the gate, and lose the key. The second manual is Good Two publications which bear upon the Paris Exhibition lie before us.

Food: What it is, and How to Get it. This ought to be popular at the The Art-Journal supplements its usual contents with an illustrated price, for there are thousands of people whose chief difficulty in life is catalogue, which is got up in admirable style. To judge from the

* how to get food"-good, bad, or indifferent. A handbook of Fishing, accounts received from Paris, we should say that purchasers of the also issued by Messrs. ROUTLEDGB, seems admirably adapted for its Art-Journal this month will have seen more of the Exhibition than the purpose—a guide to angling for boys. We should recommend Messrs. season-ticket holders have as yet, for the catalogue is profusely illus- ROUTLEDGB to dedicate the next edition to the CHANCELLOR OF THE trated, . The

subjects are chosen with taste, and drawn and engraved EXCHEQUER, who is, if we may believe Me. BERNAL OSBORNB, an adept with skill. The other portion of this long-established Art publication at the gentle craft. is up to its usual standard. MESSRS. JOHNSON AND Sox's Complete Oficial Catalogue is very hand

Laboratory v. Gasworks. somely turned out. Its exterior appearance is certainly more pleasing than that of the huge shed whose contents it enumerates. Our roaders the results of the investigations and experiments of Science, makes the

NEW scientific journal, the Laboratory, which is intended to record would not believe us if we were to say that we have read the volume following statement :carefully, so we will not say so. But we may venture unhesitatingly

“ Dr. Frankland's course of lectures on coal gas has unseated the popular belief to assert that it is just the sort of book one is likely to take up at odd respecting the conditions of luminosity of a gas-Aame. They have also disturbed intervals—and put down again.

the peace of the London Gas Companies. We have received from Messrs. ROUTLEDGE AND Sons the first The popular belief touching the luminosity of a gas-filame is—thanks number of The Book of Pigeons, by Messrs. TEGETMEIER AND HAR- to the gas companies that there is precious little of it. We are glad BISON Weir, with coloured portraits—not of the gentlemen, but of the to hear that the peace of the gas companies is threatened, for they have birds, of course. Mr. Weir is the artist par excellence for the work, thrown a gloom over every household that used their gas, and ought to and MR. TEGETMBIER is a profound and sound student in Natural suffer for it. History, and has turned his attention specially to pigeons. We are not aware whether he is the author of those touching lines —

An Oared Row.
“How happy the little birds must lie,
With their legs sticking out of the crust of a pie!”

What a pity it is the fair sex is so quarrelsome ! A ladies' boating but we should be inclined to attribute them to him.

club has been set afoot-we should say afloat-at Warwick, and it is

rows* The same publishing firm also send us two of their Househola reported that the members have already had several “ Manuals. The first is How to Preserve Fruit. The only plan we ever

water. found to answer was to put broken bottles on the top of the garden- . Query, by Printer's D.:-Perhaps the "row" intended is soft, like a herring's.

* "

on the

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Or you

Sir Morton Peto, according to promise, got up in the House the Town Talk.

other night to ask for an inquiry into the affairs of the London,

Chatham, and Dover Railway. The motion, as might have been exBY THE SAUNTERER IN SOCIETY.

pected, was refused, so the honourable gentleman had to carry his

bucket of whitewash out again. He was much buttered by the leaders HE month of

on both sides, but unfortunately that does not help in any way to reApril is famous

move the cloud which envelopes the matter, and we are no wiser than for surprises of

we were, for in introducing his motion, Sır MORTON was particular to a not very agree: avoid explaining

some of the mysteries. When he had tried and—no able nature. It doubt to his great disappointment-failed, there came a fracas, touchis ushered in by ing a motion for an inquiry into the doings of the Grand Trunk Raila day on which

way in Canada. If one may judge from a pamphlet, containing a requested to look port of a rooent meeting, the Grand Trunk seems to be in the wrong at a rent in your

coat, and then, on looking down,

are saluted with,

No. 6.
“Oh! you April

DIPLOMATISIS darkly dissemble,
go out in your

And prove that the wrong may be right, new spring suit,

But one puny nation will tremble 04 and are caught in

When England goes forth to the fight.

The insult she did to our banners,
a shower, « Oh!

Will cost her some sorrow perchance ;
you April Fool!”
With these prece-

Unless she amends her bad manners,
dents before us, we

We'll lead her a terrible dance.
can hardly be sur-
prised that the

leader of the Op-

We learn't him at school,
position, having
held a meeting to

When in youthful condition;
determine on the

I think, as a rule,

MERIVALE's the edition, line to be adopted by the Liberal party, should on the very night of the debate, when he had his course cut and dried, be intercepted in the

2. lobby, by a deputation from a small tea-room party, with the observa

Aword beloved by many a necromancer, tion, “Oh! you” -Well, “Oh! you seasonable politician!" Whether

With curious transformations for an answer. the month has other surprises in store for other people, at present there is no saying, but I don't think we shall reach May without some more

3. startling and unforeseen novelties.

It lay athwart his path, and so he trod There has been some correspondence in the Oxford Times on a sub

The vile intruder deep into the sod. ject to which I alluded' some time since the conduct of some of the

4. undergraduates at the lectures and entertainments at the Town Hall. I am sorry to think there is no improvement. “A Citizen " writes on

Tidings from every nation to his storo the subject endorsing the remarks of the reporter, who had animad

Come in a constant current evermore. verted on the indecorous behaviour of some of the "young gentlemen'

5. at a recent entertainment. “ Catcalls, hisses, stampings, groanings, curses, and coarse and offensive remarks” are enumerated, and it is

Oh! fairest maiden that poetic art stated that a lady who was singing was not spared such insults. The

E'er limned, of noble mould and tender heart; young men are also described as paying for the back seats, and forcing

Women now seek the suffrage, MR. MILL themselves into the reserved places, attacking the man in charge when

Their champion, you'd have voted for his bill. he remonstrated, and overpowering him by numbers. This letter, I

6. regret to say, stands uncontradicted, a Master of Arts writing to

Greater than the monarch's crown, admit and deplore the charges, and suggest that the entertainments

Thrones imperial casting down, shall no longer be sanctioned. Such a step would be one of great unfairness to the inhabitants of the town, who surely ought not to be

While a young bard of thee sung

Poerns in the German tongue. debarred from rational amusements because Alma Mater cannot lick her cubs into shape. It seems to me that if undergraduates were

7. forbidden to go to the Town Hall without taking and booking places

Her true love suffered sad eclipse, beforehand the difficulty would be met, and the only inconvenience in

She died upon her lover's lips. the arrangement would be experienced by those who make such a step necessary. While I am grumbling, let me add a protest against the betting spirit which has of late marked the Oxford and Cambridge

ANSWER TO A CROSTIC No. 4. Boat-race. Books are made on the event, and the speculations have in

А. Aloof F some cases assumed gigantio proportions. It is a very lamentable thing

P Portfolio that the money element should become a chief feature of the brotherly

R Romco contest between the two Universities. When it becomes a question

I Icolmkill of lucre instead of laurels, the race loses its principal charm, and the

Laundress crews are reduced to the unenviable position of Derby cracks, that it

CORRECT SOLUTIONS OF ACROSTIC No. 4, RECEIVED 10TH APRIL, 1867.-R. A., is worth the while of unprincipled men to try and hocus.

Charlton; Raoul; J. W.; Gobblts: Craize lach.e ; Spectre Pig; Cerovino; E.F.; I WENT to the Lyceum the other night to see the revival of The Pelusethy; Snuff-box; A. G. B. and C. D. G. Duke's Motto. What a capital play it is ! The plot is told with clear. ness and vigour, and every act is constructed on true principles. It

A Great Gun. is quite refreshing to come back to so genuine a piece after the trash of the sensation dramas we get nowadays. Fechter still plays Lagardère single-barrelled bill. The present Government were so determined that

The Reform Bill of the late Liberal Ministry was condemned as a with the same go and spirit—and the same tenderness—as ever.

THE Excelsior Readings, published by Mr. MundY, to which I the same epithet should not be applied to their measure, that they alluded some time since, have reached a fourth part, and the pub- bill with a vengeance. We doubted, however, whether such duplicity

introduced duality of franchise, so that theirs was a double-barrelled lished series lies before me. The selections seem judiciously made, would be persisted in. and are arranged with every care. The binding, to which notice is particularly drawn, is a novelty intended to ensure strength and durability, two qualities which will recommend themselves to parents and

Stirring him up with the Wal-pole. guardians, though they may not command much popularity among ALTHOUGH the Home Secretary has respited Wager, it is no odds, the youngsters.

for he has not proved himself TOOMER-ciful.

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OUR BIOGRAPHICAL DICTIONARY. (An Intercepted Communication addressed to the Editor of NOTES AND


N.B.-In compliance with the wishes of a quarter of a million correspondents

who have written to us on the subject, we promise not to follow a strictly alphaSIR, -I have just lighted upon the fullowing curious extract from a

betical order. The names of the authors will in future be given (by request). Venetian newspaper of that indefinito time krown as “the period,” from which you will see that Parliamentary language-which some

Bright, John, M.P. By Professor GOLDWIN Smith and SIR times conceals the thoughts, and always amplifies the expression—is ARCHIBALD ALISON (in conjunction). This illustrious benefactor of his not peculiar to these later days, but prevailed in those from which native land first saw the light in 1811; and, ever since, his career has Shakespeare drew his materials for the tragedy of “Othello."" The been one of unmitigated mischief. It has been his constant object to discovery is also valuable as illustrating that disdain of originality promote the welfaro of the down-trodden millions; and, by setting which is one of the most daring characteristics of the Immortal Bard. class against class, to provoke all the horrors of revolution. His I need scarcely add that the speech, reported in modern style, is that eloquent voice has always been raised on behalf of the poor; and, like of the Moor to the Venetian Council upon the subject of his elopement other manufacturing tyrants, he is notorious for cruelty to his own with Desdemona. I give it textually as it stands in the debate.

workpeople. Of late years his political influence has rapidly increased; "General Othello, Commanding in Chief, then rose, and ad- and there is every reason to believe that he will soon be relegated to dressing the most potent, grave, and reverend' signors—if’they would that congenial obscurity from which he ought never to have emerged. allow him to call them so—said that he (the hon. and gallant

gen. Mr. Brigut a long and honourable career; but the burly agitators

Still in the full prime of manly vigour, we may fairly anticipate for tleman) was free to confess that he had taken away the old man's daughter; it was also true that he had entered into a matrimonial failing health may at any moment remove him from the scene of his alliance with that lady; but this he considered to be the extent of his mischievous activity. His diction has long been considered a model responsibility: He admitted that his manner might be wanting in of pure and Saxon English; whilst his turgid and tumid vituperations suavity, and deficient in the conventional modes of expression which have earned for him the apt nickname of the foul-mouthed Quaker.” belong to a tranquil state of existence. For since his (the hon. and He is a devoted friend of peace; . nor has there ever been a more gallant gentleman's) arms had advanced to so approximate a period of quarrelsome and vindictive politician. In the House of Commons he maturity as the age of seven years, until their present condition, is supported by a devoted band of staunch political adherents, of which had been one of comparative inactivity for the space of nino whom the most remarkable is Mr. LEATHAM ; and he is now deserted months, they had employed the action in which his fundest affections by all except a few desperate incendiaries, of whom the most notorious were concentrated, in fields of battle adjacent to the encampments of is a DIR. LEATHAM, formerly unseated for bribery and corruption. Mr. the army which he had the honour to command. He (the hon. and John Brigur's brother, JACOB, is also a well-known advocate of gallant gentleman) was competent to speak but to a limited extent of political and social reform; the reckless demagogue having unscruputhe great world-not, indeed, in a more extended degree than would lously led even the members of his own family circle into the evil relate to martial achievements; and he considered, therefore, that he

course that he himself pursued. Further eulogy of this illustrious should add but little to the object he had in view by attempting the

man would be superfluous; and happily we need not trouble ourselves advocacy of his own interests. without, he hoped, unnecessary intrusion upon the patience of the to do so ? On Mr. BRADLAUGH's own principles of historical criticism, Nevertheless, he was prepared, any longer with this fiend in human shape.

BRADLAUGH. See “Iconoclast;" and yet, why take the trouble assembly, to make a statement (which he could assure them should there is not the slightest reason to suppose that he ever existed.. If he be distinguished by rotundity, and characterized by an absence of

Moral :—Keep out of his way, artificial adornment) of the entire career of his affection, including did, or if he does, so much the worse ! the nature of the chemical preparations, the inducements of an il- my young friend! There are worse politicians than BRADLAUGH ; but, legitimate character, nay more, the illegal processes (for these entered thank goodness, very few! Committed suicide in 1867, after reading into the scope of the impeachment) by which he had boen onabled to | Abbey, with a stake through his body, by the kind intercession of a

a biographical notice of himself in Fun. Was buried in Westminster appropriate to himself the most aflectionate manifestations of the lady who stood in the relation of daughter to the hon. and aggrieved | bishop whom he had frequently abused. This story seems dubious. gentleman."

Everything is dubious according to BRADLAUGH. The probability is I need not trouble your readers with the rest of the speech. The

that BRADLAUGH was only a Myth. It don't matter! above will be sufficient, I hope, to satisfy lovers of parliamentary

BUTLER, SAMUEL. By His SHADE. (Communicated.) language, as well of future editors of Shakespeare—if such infatuated

As Alchymist who scans his crucible, beings as the latter are possible in the present day.--Yours, &c.,

Hoping that ore is thence producible,

First takes a lump of baser metal, (I enclose my card, not necessarily for publication, but as a guaran

And pops it plump into his kettle, tee of my nonentity.)

Then stirs it round and lets it settle,
Or watches it boil over, humbly

In hopes that gold may ’neath the scum lie,
Is this a dagger ?" etc.

And afterwards the process tells us
Is this MAZZENIAN, we should like to know?

Like to the wizard PARACELSUS ;

Or, rather, as sagacious leech
WANTED-age about 14.-Apply, etc.

Picks pois'nous herbs, and takes from each,

By process strange of distillation, It is high time the police interfered, when assassins arc thus publicly

Ingredients fit for fermentation, advertised-for!

With joy as great, this physic-mixer,

As he who brews the Grand Elixir,
Nothing New.

He dreams at night of pill and bolus
THE Réunion Lyrique of Brussels have organised a dramatic per-

As alchymist of bright Pactolus ! formance for the benefit of “The Society for giving Medicine to the

So BUTLER, scorning Covenanters, Poor, gratis !” The idea is a good one, and the plan a very suitable

And hating Conventicle canters, one-many is the dose we have had at a theatre in our time !-N.B.

Just took from each what each had worse, The reader having paid his penny for his copy, may take his choice

And fused them in satiric verse, whether he shall pronounce the "S in “dose

Hoping to mako-not you or me sick-
But either gold or wholesome physic!

Physic, indeed, he made, for drastic
Notes and Queries.

Were all his couplets Hudibrastic;
DANTE was an Italian poet. His wife was much given to music,

But as for gold, by Fortune's whim, and her name still survives in many musical compositions—it was

No gold came ever near to him! ANN-DANTE, but he always called her Beatrice for short.

For King and Church he used his weapons, The representation of Minorities is much talked of. An instance of

And got fur's pains more kicks than ha pence! it may be found in the present Bankruptcy Laws, in which the minority Born at Strensham in Worcestershire, 1612. Died ir Rose-street, is clearly represented, it being taken for granted that all bankrupts are Covent-garden, 1680. honest until proved to be the contrary. It will be noticed that though seers are ordinarily supposed to be

A Tall bit of Kews. wise, overseers are seldom found to be overwise.

Our readers will be pleased to hear that a tell-ye-giraffe-ic despatch

reports the shipment of a number of fine animals to replace those The grain that is up earliest-Sun-ryes.

lately destroyed by fire at the Zoological Gardens, Regent's-park.


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I WONDER what it all means! Year after year, just as the leaves are Red's a fool to it! Call it scarlet and purple gone mad, and then
coming out, and a fellow really begins to enjoy his swim of a morning, you'll describe a faint blush compared to those old ecclesiastical fea-
all the neighbourhood seems to go downright mad. If you go out tures! Don't tell me. You leave me alone. I know what I'm talk-
with your wife, for instance or take, say, a few cygnets (in a ring) ing about. Get out! And then, the girls—the finest girls in society,
for a batho-down upon you comes a horrible machine. I know 'em, I am told. I wonder whether they will ever get fond of me, those
ugh ; know 'em well; but I can't make out why they do it. There's interesting social LEDAS! My dear, you leave me alone!
that young rascal, TOTTENHAM; many's the time I've seen him with a Bless 'em! Look at their little boots-no webbed feet there, eh, old
sort of plucky grin all over his face; why does he come here bothering girl? Eh, Mrs. S.? Flop! Flop! Flop! “Boots at the Swan,"
me and mine, when he had much better stay at home, like a good boy, eh? 'Pon honour, Mrs. S., not so bad, not so bad!

Look reading the Fathers ? Later in the year one gets used to it. A boat here, though : a race is a race, well and good. Human race, ornithomore or less don't matter, out of twenty or thirty at a time; but then, logical race, Oxford and Cambridge race: exactly : all that's right like sensible people, the London oarsmen wait until it's nice and warm. enough ;- but oh, you steamboats, oh, you muzzy • captains," oh, you

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What do you think though, yourself, of maniacs like the Oxford crew, gaping Cockneysthere, it don't do to talk about! Coming up here at who went out “for practice in a gale of wind, and nearly swamped a shilling a head, and nearly running over the “eights"-get out! the boat? Oh; you call it plucky, do you? Call it what you like! Not that I've much reason to love the “eights,” you know; and I Get out! I call it ridiculous. Then, look at the crowds that come don't. At least, I try not to. But so sure as ever that Saturday down, days and days before the race; well, I

nce knew

very morning of all the Saturday mornings in the year comes round, why, respectable Pigeon, who had been taken down to see the Derby, and he well or ill, I manage to get a cosy berth somewhere in the neighbourtold me that a boat-race crowd, compared to an Epsom mixture, is hood—and I hear them coming, coming, lashing through the water, rather a select assembly of ladies and gentlemen. "Oh yes; I dare I hear cheers on the bank, I hear even that brutal puffing and wheezsay.

Why, blow my web-feet, and shiver my tendons, ing of the steamboats ; and, by Jove-an old mythological friend of look at 'em-rushing along the towing-path like maniacs; look at the yours, Mrs. S.!by Jove, if it were not for physical impossibilities and fat old boys, with clean shaven faces, and rosy gills, and white chokers, the fear of making myself ridiculous, I should shout, “Go it, Oxford !" putting on a spurt, and cheering until they get red in the face. Red and stick a dark blue feather in my tail!


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